“Mudzimai wangu paakafa, chandaida kwaiva kugara mukushandisa, kuitira kuti unzwe wakachengetedzwa uye uchikwanisa kukomberedza Melvil pamwe chete sezvinobvira. Shungu dzangu dzainge dzisingaperi asi ndaifanira kuchengeta mwana wedu. Nguva zhinji, ndaida kuiputira mububble kuputira uye kuitsvedza mudhirowa kuti pasave nezvinozoitika kwairi, asi ndaizvimanikidza kuti ndizviite nemazvo, dzimwe nguva ndichitumira kune njodzi dzayo kana njodzi dzayo. mabasa emurume mudiki. Kutaura zvazviri, ndaida kuva baba vakakwana, gumi pagumi zuva nezuva. Kunze kwezvo, ini ndakatogadzira rating system. Ndakanga ndichibvisa kubva pamapoinzi dai Melvil asina kuwana nguva yekudya kwake kwemangwanani akagara patafura nekuti ini ndakanga ndisati ndanyatsotaura zvakakwana nezvenguva yekumuka. Ndakabvisa mapoinzi kana ndakanamira keke rechokoreti mumuromo make pachinzvimbo chechingwa chechingwa chitsva, ndakazvitongesa pakupera kwezuva, ndichidzokorora kutadza kwega kwega, ndichigara ndichivavarira kuita zvirinani zuva rinotevera.
Kutya kusaita zvakakwana kumwanakomana wangu, kana kusaisa mwoyo wakakwana mazviri, kwakanga kusingatsungiririki kwandiri. Ndakatamba mupaki nechido chakakwana here? Ndakanga ndaverenga nyaya ndiripo here? Ndakange ndamumbundira zvakanyanya here? Akanga asisina amai, ndaifanira kuva vose, asi sezvo ndaigona kuva baba, ndaifanira kuva. Dambudziko remuchina, dzvinyiriro yakazara, kuitira kuti manzwiro asambouya kuzokanganisa kuvakazve kwangu. Mhedzisiro yandisina kumbofunga nezvayo. Pamusoro pazvose, kuchema kwangu kwaisafanira kundidhonzera pasi nokuti ndaiziva kuti mugomo wacho waisava nepasi. Saka ndakasimuka, seruoko rwechishandiso chemuchina, nesimba uye nemichina, ndakatakura kakomana kangu kumucheto kwechibatiso changu chenhare. Dzimwe nguva ndakapofumadzwa nemaitiro aya, ndakatadza. Zvakaitika kwandiri kuti ndisaone kuti aive nefivha, kusanzwa kuti ari kurwadziwa, kushatirwa, kuvhunduka pamberi pe "kwete" yake. Kudawo kunyanyokwana, ndakakanganwa kuva munhu. Hasha dzangu dzimwe nguva dzainge dzanyanya.
Zvino, rimwe zuva chairo, ndinofunga zvinhu zvakachinja. Ndakafamba ndichidzokera kumashure kumutambo wetiyeri webhuku rangu rekutanga. Ndakazviita muchivande ndichinyara kuti ndingazivikanwa mumba umu. Ndaitya ndiripo asi ndakagadzirira kutarisana nehunhu hwangu. Zvisinei, apo mutambi akapinda muchiitiko akataura chinyorwa, ndakaona munhu mumwe chete, mumwe munhu akanaka kwazvo, hongu, asi ari kure neni. Saka ndakakwanisa kumusiya mukamuri pandakaenda, kumusiya kuimba yake yemitambo, kukudzidzira kwake, achitaura manheru oga oga nyaya yakanga isisiri yangu uye kuti ndine manzwiro ekuti ndakabira Hélène zvishomanana. . zvakare, kuiburitsa nenyaya yangu kuti vese vaone. Ndakaudza nhanho dzangu dzekutanga sababa ndiri ndega, anecdote yevanaamai kukireshi vachigadzira mash uye compotes kumwanakomana wangu, kana kunyange izwi kubva kune uyu muvakidzani pakumhara kwandaisaziva, achipa kundibatsira naMelvil kana. zvakakosha ... Zvese zvinhu izvi zvaiita kunge zviri kure. Ndakanga ndavakunda.
Sezvo paivepo kare uye shure kwekufa kwaHelena, pakanga paine pamberi uye pashure manheru ano panzvimbo yemitambo. Kuva baba vakanaka kwakaramba kuchindikurudzira, asi kwete nenzira imwe cheteyo. Ndinoisa simba rangu mairi asi ndinoisa mumwe mweya mukati maro, pedyo newangu panguva ino. Ndakabvuma kuti I could be a normal daddy, be wrong, change my mind.
Zvishoma nezvishoma, ndakanzwa kuti ndaigona kurondedzera zvizere manzwiro, sezuva randakatora Melvil kuti ndinomuitira ice cream mupaki umo mai vake neni takasangana.
Ndaisafanira kurongedza ndangariro iyi kuti ndiiise mudumpster, sezvo ndaifanira kuita zvimwe zvezvinhu zvaHelene. Akanga asina kuravira kusingatsungiririki kwemwedzi yakanga yapfuura. Ndakazokwanisa kutendeuka murugare mundangariro. Saka ndaida kuratidza mwana wangu kuti ndisati ndave "baba vakakwana", iniwo ndaiva mwana, mwana anoenda kuchikoro, anotamba, anodonha, asiwo mwana. mwana ane vabereki vanozviparadzanisa, uye amai vanofa nokukurumidza… Ndakaenda naMelvil kunzvimbo dzehudiki hwangu. Kuwirirana kwedu kwakawedzera. Ndinonzwisisa kuseka kwake uye ndinonzwisisa kunyarara kwake. Zvangu zviri pedyo nedzake.
Makore mashoma Hélène afa, ndakasangana nomumwe mukadzi vandakafunga kutama navo. Ndakatadza kuvhura denderedzwa iro ini naMelvil taumba, risinga patsanuke. Zvakaoma kuwanira munhu nzvimbo. Zvakadaro mufaro wakadzoka. Hélène harisi zita rakashata. Hachisiri chipoko chiya chatambudza imba yedu. She now populates her, she is with us. ”
Zvakatorwa kubva mubhuku raAntoine Leiris “La vie, après” éd. Robert Laffont.