Kuvepo kwemanzwiro evanhu vakafa, ndangariro dzekushungurudzika kwakaitika, ndangariro dzakaungana - zvese izvi zvinotipa manzwiro akasimba uye zvinokanganisa hupenyu hwedu. Nei kudzokera kuzvakaitika kare uye kubata nenhamo kuchigona kutibatsira iye zvino?
Ndangariro dzedu dzakaumbwa nezvimedu zvakawanda zvakasiyana. Tinozvichengeta mumifananidzo, playlists, zviroto uye pfungwa. Asi dzimwe nguva kudzokororwa kwenguva yakapfuura kunova chimiro chekupindwa muropa: kunyudzwa mu melancholy kunogona kuve nemhedzisiro yakasiyana.
Kushushikana nendangariro chiitiko chakave chakasarudzika muma1980s, uye gumi gare gare chakatora chimiro mune izwi rekuti Trauma uye Memory Zvidzidzo. Ndangariro dzekutambudzika, sendangariro dzese dzevanhu, dzinowanzokanganisa. Vanhu vanowanzorangarira kukuvadzwa kukuru kupfuura zvavakasangana nazvo.
Izvi zvinoitika nokuda kwezvikonzero zviviri.
Wekutanga anogona kudanwa "kuvandudza ndangariro": mushure mechiitiko chinoshungurudza, kurangarira kwake nemaune uye pfungwa dzakanyanya pamusoro pake zvinogona kuwedzera mamwe matsva ayo nekufamba kwenguva munhu achazviona sechikamu chechiitiko. Somuenzaniso, kana mwana akarumwa nembwa yomuvakidzani uye akataura ataurazve pamusoro peichi chiitiko, nokufamba kwamakore kurumwa kuduku kuchanyorwa mundangariro yake muchimiro cheronda guru. Nehurombo, kukwidziridzwa kwendangariro kune mhedzisiro chaiyo: iyo yakakura iyi kukwidziridzwa, iyo yakanyanya kufunga pfungwa nemifananidzo zvinoshungurudza munhu. Nokufamba kwenguva, idzi pfungwa dzisina ruzivo nemifananidzo zvinogona kujairana sevaya vane ruzivo.
Chikonzero chechipiri chekukanganiswa uku ndechekuti vanhu kazhinji havasi vatori vechikamu muzviitiko zvinoshungurudza, asi zvapupu. Pane chinhu chakadai sechapupu trauma. Uku ndiko kushungurudza kwepfungwa kunogona kuitika mumunhu anoona mamiriro ezvinhu ane ngozi uye anotyisa - asi iye pachake asingatyisidzirwi nazvo.
Olga Makarova, analytical oriented psychologist, anotaura nezvekukosha kweiyi pfungwa mumamiriro emazuva ano:
"Kana kare, kuti uwane kukuvadzwa kwakadaro, zvaive zvakakodzera kuva mune imwe nzvimbo pane imwe nguva, kuti tive chapupu chechiitiko chacho, saka nhasi zvakakwana kungovhura nhau.
Munyika munogara mune chimwe chinhu chakaipa. Pazuva ripi neripi regore, unogona kuona chimwe chinhu chinokatyamadza uye chinokushungurudza.
Kushungurudzika kweanomira kunogona kuva kwakanyanya uye, maererano nesimba remanzwiro asina kunaka, kunyange kukwikwidzana nekutora chikamu chaicho muzviitiko zvinoshungurudza (kana kuswedera pedyo navo).
Semuenzaniso, kumubvunzo wekuti "Wakamanikidzwa sei pachiyero che 1 kusvika ku10 nezve mhedzisiro yekudengenyeka kwenyika muJapan?" maJapan, aive akananga munzvimbo yechiitiko, achapindura «4». Uye muSpaniard anogara zviuru zvemakiromita kubva pakutyisidzira, asi akaongorora zvakadzama, pasi pegirazi rinokudza, ruzivo rwekuparadza uye njodzi dzevanhu munhau uye masocial network, achanyatso kutaura kuti kushushikana kwake pamusoro peizvi igumi. .
Izvi zvinogona kukonzera kuvhiringidzika uye kunyange hutsinye, uyezve chishuvo chekupomera munhu weSpaniard wepamusoro-soro - vanoti, sei, nokuti hapana chinomutyisidzira! Asi kwete, manzwiro aya ndeechokwadi zvachose. Uye kushungurudzika kwechapupu kunogona kukanganisa zvakanyanya mamiriro epfungwa uye hupenyu huzhinji. Uyewo, kana munhu achiwedzera kunzwira tsitsi, ndipo paanonyanya kubatanidzwa mupfungwa mune chero chaanoona.”
Pamusoro pekuvhunduka, kutya, kutya, kutsamwa uye kupererwa panguva yekusangana nezvinoshungurudza, munhu anogona kuzosangana nemhedzisiro. Aya ndiwo maitiro ekutya, kusuruvara kwenguva refu, kuparara kwetsinga, misodzi pasina chikonzero, matambudziko ekurara.
Nyanzvi yepfungwa inokurudzira matanho anotevera ese sekudzivirira uye se "kurapa"
Deredza ruzivo runouya (zvinoda kupa zvido zvemavara chete, pasina mafoto nemavhidhiyo).
Chengetedza muviri wako (famba, idya, kurara, kurovedza muviri).
Containerize, ndiko kuti, maitiro, manzwiro (kudhirowa, kuimba, kubika kwakakodzera - mutambo waunofarira unobatsira mumamiriro ezvinhu akadaro kupfuura zvese).
Ziva miganhu uye siyanisa manzwiro ako kubva kune evamwe. Zvibvunze mibvunzo: ndizvo zvandiri kunzwa zvino? Kana kuti ndiri kubatanidza kutya kwomumwe munhu?
Mubhuku rake rakakurumbira rinonzi Sorrow and Melancholy , Freud akataura kuti "hatimbofi takarega nokuzvidira kubatanidzwa kwedu mupfungwa: chokwadi chokuti takasiiwa hazvirevi kuti tiri kupedza ukama neakatisiya."
Ndosaka tichitamba mamiriro akafanana muhukama, mapikicha epurojekiti yaamai nababa kune vadikani, uye manzwiro anoenderana nevamwe. Ndangariro dzehukama hwekare kana vanhu vakasiya vanogona kupindwa muropa uye kukanganisa hukama hutsva.
Vamik Volkan, purofesa wezvepfungwa paYunivhesiti yeVirginia, muchinyorwa chake The Work of Grief: Evaluating Relationships and Release, anodana aya mapatya epfungwa. Mukuona kwake, ndangariro dzedu dzinochengeta mapatya epfungwa evanhu vose uye zvinhu zvinogara kana kuti zvakambogara munyika yedu. Izvo zviri kure nepakutanga uye pane zvinosanganisira sensations, fantasy, asi zvinomutsa manzwiro chaiwo uye zviitiko.
Izwi raFreud rokuti "basa rekusuwa" rinotsanangura maitiro ekugadzirisa mukati nekunze kunofanira kuitwa mushure mekurasikirwa kana kuparadzana.
Zvinokwanisika kurega kudzokera kuhukama hwekare kana kushuva vanhu vakaenda chete apo, patinonzwisisa kuti nei hukama uhwu nevanhu vaikosha zvikuru. Iwe unofanirwa kuaita mapikicha madiki, zvinyudze mundangariro uye uzvigamuchire sezvavari.
Kazhinji tinosuwa kwete munhu, asi manzwiro atakasangana nawo pedyo naye.
Uye iwe unofanirwa kudzidza kunzwa manzwiro akafanana pasina uyu munhu.
Munguva yekuchinja kwepasi rose, vakawanda vanochinjira kukuchinja kusina munhu aitarisira. Ramangwana rinotaridzika zvakasiyana uye zvakanyanya kusatarisika. Isu tose tinotarisana nekurasikirwa: mumwe munhu anorasikirwa nebasa rake, mukana wekuita zvinhu zvavo zvenguva dzose uye kutaurirana nevadiwa, mumwe munhu anorasikirwa nevadiwa vavo.
Kudzokera kune yakapfuura mumamiriro ezvinhu aya kunorapa: panzvimbo yekubata kushushikana kwekurasikirwa mukati, zvakanyanya kururamisa kuchema kurasikirwa. Ipapo pane mukana wokunzwisisa zvarinoreva. Kutora nguva yekuziva nekunzwisisa manzwiro atinosangana nawo nekuda kwekurasikirwa uye kusuwa uye nekuataura ndiyo nzira yakanaka yekudzidza kubva kare.