PSYchology

Isu tose takasiyana, asi, tichigara padivi pemudiwa, tinochinja uye tinopa kune mumwe nemumwe. Zvakanakisisa sei kunzwa zvinodiwa nemudiwa uye kuwana kuwirirana muhukama? Isu tinopa mana emitambo mabasa ayo achakubatsira iwe kuwana yako chiyero chehukama newaunoshanda naye uye kugara pamwe chete nemufaro nekusingaperi.

Hukama ibasa. Asi iwe unogona kuita kuti zvive nyore uye zvinonakidza. Nyanzvi dzepfungwa Anne Sauzed-Lagarde naJean-Paul Sauzed vanopa maekisesaizi epfungwa kuti akubatsire kuzivana nekunzwisisana zviri nani.

Exercise nhamba 1. Chinhambwe chakarurama

Basa racho nderekunzwa kureba kwakanyatsokodzera kune mumwe nemumwe wevakaroorana uye vaviri vacho vese.

  • Mira kumashure kumusana nemumwe. Zorora uye upe kune chido chekufamba wakasununguka. Chii "kutamba" chichaitika pakati penyu? Munhu anoenderera mberi sei nesangano iri nemumwe wake? Ndeipi pfungwa dzekutsigirwa, uye chii, pane zvinopesana, chinotyisidzira kuwira?
  • Mirai chiso nechiso nhanho gumi. Chinjana kuswedera kune mumwe wako chinyararire. Fambai zvishoma nezvishoma kuti muwane chinhambwe chakakodzera kana muri pedyo zvikuru nemumwe. Dzimwe nguva imwe, nhanho diki kumberi kana kumashure inokwana kuti unzwe chinhambwe icho kuswedera kwave kutorema, uye zvakasiyana: nguva iyo chinhambwe chinokubvumira kuti unzwe kuparadzaniswa kwako.
  • Itai maekisesaizi mamwe chete, asi panguva ino mose fambai kune mumwe nemumwe, kuyedza kunzwa chinhambwe chakakodzera muvaviri vako uye uchirangarira kuti chinhambwe ichi chinoratidza mamiriro ako chaiwo "pano uye izvozvi".

Exercise nhamba 2. Hupenyu mutsara weviri

Pabepa rakakura, dhirowa, mumwe nemumwe, mutsara wehupenyu hwevaviri vako. Funga nezvechimiro chauri kupa mutsara uyu.

Inotangira papi uye inoperera pai?

Nyora pamusoro pemutsara uyu zviitiko zvakaitika munhoroondo yevaviri vako. Unogonawo kushandisa mufananidzo, izwi, gwapa reruvara kumiririra pfungwa dzakasiyana dzaunofunga kuti dzakatungamirira (kana kuvhiringidza) upenyu hwako pamwe chete.

Wotora nguva yekuenzanisa mitsara yehupenyu yevaviri vako yawakadhirowa zvakasiyana, uye zvino edza kudhirowa mutsara uyu pamwechete.

Exercise nhamba 3. Vakaroorana vakakwana

Ndeupi murume wako akakodzera? Ndiani kwauri mudenderedzwa rako repedyo kana munharaunda anoshanda semuenzaniso wevakaroorana vakabudirira? Vaviri vapi vaungada kuita?

Pane chimwe nechimwe chezviviri izvi, nyora pasi pabepa zvinhu zvishanu zvaunoda kana zvishanu zvausingade. Tora nguva yekutaura nemumwe wako kuti uite iyi modhi (kana counter-modhi). Uye ona kuti unokwanisa sei kuzvifananidza.

Exercise nhamba 4. Kufamba usingaoni

Mumwe wevadyidzani akavharwa maziso. Anobvumira wechipiri kumutora kuti ambofamba mubindu kana kupoteredza imba. Mufambidzani anotungamira anogona kupa vateveri mabasa ekuona kwekunzwa (kubata zvirimwa, zvinhu) kana kufamba (kukwira masitepisi, kumhanya, kusvetuka, kutonhora panzvimbo). Govera nguva imwechete kune wese ari pabasa remufambisi, maminetsi makumi maviri ndiwo akanakisa. Zvinokurudzirwa kuita chiitiko ichi kunze.

Pakupera kwechiitwa ichi, iva nechokwadi chekutaura pamusoro pezvakasangana nemumwe wenyu nezvaakanzwa. Iri ibasa rekuvimba nemumwe, asiwo pane yedu zano rezvinotarisirwa nemumwe kubva kwatiri kana zvaanoda. Uye pakupedzisira, iyi inguva yekuziva mazano aunawo pamusoro pemumwe wako: "Murume wangu ane simba, zvinoreva kuti ndichamumhanyisa kana kufamba nemumakwenzi." Kunyangwe hazvo murume achitya, uye anotambura ...

Aya maekisesaizi anopiwa ne psychoanalysts Anne Sauzed-Lagarde naJean-Paul Sauzed mubhuku Ā«Creating a Lasting CoupleĀ» (A. SauzĆØde-Lagarde, J.-P. SauzĆØde Ā«CrĆ©er un couple durableĀ», InterƉditions, 2011).

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