Nderini pawakapedzisira kuseka kana kupusa iwe nemumwe wako? Apo isu tiri vaviri takasvetukira pamusoro pemhepo, takafamba mumvura tichitenderera guta usiku? Kana iwe usingakwanise kurangarira, saka unogona kushandisa jekiseni rinonakidza rekufara uye kukanganisa. Nyanzvi munyaya dzewanano John Gottman anoti zviri nyore: Vakaroorana vanotamba vese vanogara vese.
Pawakatanga kufambidzana, pamwe hauna kuchengetedza nguva yemajee, zvinoshamisa, uye antics anosetsa. Zuva rega rega raive chiitiko chitsva, chinofadza. “Wakavaka hukama nerudo pahwaro hwemutambo. Uye hapana chikonzero chekurega kuita izvi kana iwe uchinyura mu "yakakomba" kana hukama hwenguva refu, "anodaro tenzi wepfungwa dzemhuri John Gottman mubhuku idzva "8 Mazuva Akakosha".
Mutambo wacho unonakidza, unonakidza, wakapusa. Uye ... nekuda kweichi chikonzero isu tinowanzo kusundidzira kusvika kumagumo erondedzero yeakanyanya kukosha mabasa epamba - anofinha, anosemesa, asi anosungirwa. Hazvishamisi kuti nekufamba kwenguva, mhuri inotanga kuonekwa nesu semuitiro, semutoro unorema watinofanira kutakura pamapfudzi edu.
Kugovera Mafaro neMitambo Kunogadzira Kuvimba, Kushamwaridzana uye Kubatana Kwakadzika
Kuti uchinje mafungiro aya, mafaro anonakidza kune ese ari maviri, angave ari mutambo wetennis kana hurukuro pamusoro penhoroondo yecinema, inofanirwa kufungwa uye kurongwa pachine nguva. Maererano neMarriage and Family Research Center, kuwirirana kuri pakati pemafaro uye kufara kwevakaroorana kwakakwirira uye kunobudisa pachena. Paunodyara mari mumafaro, hushamwari, uye nekuchengeta mudiwa wako, hukama hwenyu hunowedzera kufara nekufamba kwenguva.
Kunakidzwa nekutamba pamwe chete (mbiri, pasina foni, hapana vana!) kunovaka kuvimbana, hukama hwepedyo, uye kubatana kwakadzama. Kunyangwe uri paragliding, kukwira makomo, kana kutamba mutambo webhodhi, munogovana chinangwa chakafanana, batirana pamwe nekunakidzwa, izvo zvinosimbisa chisungo chenyu.
Tsvaga kuwirirana
Kudiwa kwekunakidzwa kunowanikwa pasi rose, asi isu tinotsvaga hutsva munzira dzakawanda. Uye iwe haugone kutaura kuti imwe yakaipa kana nani pane imwe. Vamwe vanhu vanoshivirira njodzi, vanoda zvakanyanya kana kuti zvine njodzi adventures kuti vawane mazinga akafanana e dopamine ayo vamwe vanowana kubva kune yakaderera.
Kana iwe nemumwe wako muine mazano akasiyana pamusoro pezvinoita sekunakidzwa uye kunakidzwa, zvakanaka. Ongorora nzvimbo dzawakafanana, tsvaga paunosiyana, uye tsvaga pamunobvumirana.
Chero chinhu chinogona kuve chiitiko, chero bedzi chichisundira munhu kunze kwenzvimbo yavo yekunyaradza.
Kune vamwe vakaroorana, chinhu chinonakidza kutora kirasi yekubika kana vasina kumbobika muupenyu hwavo. Kana kutora kupenda, kana chinhu chega chavapenda muhupenyu hwavo hwese chiri "tsvimbo, tsvimbo, gaka." Chiitiko hachifanirwe kunge chiri pamusoro pegomo chiri kure kana kutyisidzira hupenyu. Kutsvaga adventure kunoreva, muchokwadi, kurwira zvitsva uye zvisingawanzo.
Chinhu chipi nechipi chinogona kuva chiitiko, chero bedzi chichisundira munhu kunze kwenzvimbo yake yekunyaradza, ichimuzadza ne dopamine mufaro.
Zvekunakidzwa
Kubva pakurongwa kwemitambo uye varaidzo yevaviri, yakanyorwa naJohn Gottman, takasarudza 30. Maka iyo mitatu yepamusoro pakati pavo kana kuti uuye neyako. Ngavave pekutangira kwemakore ako akawanda ekubatana adventures. Saka unogona:
- Endai parwendo kana rwendo rurefu pamwe chete kuenda kunzvimbo iyo vaviri vangada kushanyira.
- Tambai bhodhi kana mutambo wemakadhi pamwechete.
- Sarudza uye edzai mutambo wevhidhiyo mutsva pamwe chete.
- Gadzira ndiro pamwe chete maererano nekamukira itsva; unogona kukoka shamwari dzako kuti dziiravire.
- Tamba mabhora.
- Tangai kudzidza mutauro mutsva pamwe chete (angangoita matauriro mashoma).
- Kuratidza chirevo chekunze mukutaura, kuita ... hongu, chero chinhu!
- Enda kubhasikoro uye wohaya tandem.
- Dzidzai mutambo mutsva pamwe chete (semuenzaniso kukwira matombo) kana kuenda rwendo rwechikepe/rwendo rwekayaking.
- Enda kukuvandudza, kuita, kuimba kana tango makosi pamwe chete.
- Verengai pamwe chete muunganidzwa wenhetembo dzenyanduri mutsva wenyu.
- Enda kune konzati yemimhanzi inorarama.
- Tenga matikiti ezviitiko zvemitambo zvaunofarira uye fadza vatori vechikamu pamwechete.
•Bhukurai mushonga wespa uye munakirwe nebhabhu inopisa kana sauna mese
- Ridzai zviridzwa zvakasiyana pamwechete.
- Tamba spy mumall kana pakufamba uchitenderera guta.
- Enda parwendo uye kuravira waini, doro, chokoreti kana ice cream.
- Tauriranai nyaya dzezvinoitika zvinonyadzisa kana zvinosetsa zvehupenyu hwenyu.
- Svetuka pane trampoline.
- Enda kune panda park kana imwe theme park.
- Tambai pamwechete mumvura: kushambira, ski yemvura, surf, yacht.
- Ronga zuva risina kujairika: sangana kune imwe nzvimbo, fungidzira kuti iwe unoonana kekutanga. Flitter uye edza kunyengererana.
- Dhirowa pamwe chete - mune watercolor, penzura kana mafuta.
- Enda kune tenzi kirasi mune mamwe mabasa emaoko ane chekuita nekusona, kugadzira mhizha, kugadzira matanda kana pavhiri remuumbi.
- Kanda mabiko asina kurongeka uye koka munhu wese anogona kuuya kwairi.
- Dzidza masaja evakaroorana.
- Nyoreranai tsamba yerudo neruoko rwenyu rworuboshwe (kana mumwe wenyu ari kuruboshwe, ipapo noruoko rworudyi).
- Enda kumakirasi ekubika.
- Svetuka kubva ku bungee.
- Ita chimwe chinhu chawagara uchida kuita asi uchitya kuedza.
Verenga zvakawanda munaJohn Gottman's 8 Akakosha Mazuva. Maitiro ekugadzira hukama hwehupenyu ”(Audrey, Eksmo, 2019).
Nezve Nyanzvi: John Gottman murapi wemhuri, mutungamiriri weRelationship Research Institute (RRI), uye munyori wemabhuku akati wandei anotengeswa zvakanyanya pahukama hwevaviri.