Mukati
Kubatana kwakanaka, hukama hwakavakwa parudo chete, ndeimwe yengano huru. Mirangariro isina kururama yakadaro inogona kuva misungo yakakomba munzira yeroorano. Izvo zvakakosha kuti utarise pasi uye debunk idzi ngano munguva - asi kwete kuti unyure mugungwa rekusaziva uye kurega kutenda murudo, asi kuitira kubatsira muchato "kushanda" zviri nani.
1. Rudo rwega runokwana kuti zvinhu zvifambe zvakanaka.
Mhepo yechishuwo, muchato unokurumidza-mheni uye kurambana kwakafanana mumakore mashoma. Zvese zvinova chikonzero chekupokana: basa, imba, shamwari ...
Vachangobva kuchata Lily naMax vaive nenhau yakafanana yeshungu. Iye mubatsiri wemari, muimbi. Akadzikama uye akadzikama, iye anoputika uye ane chimbichimbi. "Ndakafunga: sezvo tichidanana, zvese zvichafamba, zvese zvichave sezvazvinofanira!" anonyunyuta kushamwari dzake mushure mekurambana.
“Hakuchina ngano inonyengera, inorwadza uye inoparadza,” inodaro nyanzvi yeroorano Anna-Maria Bernardini. “Rudo rwoga haruna kukwana kuti murume nomudzimai varambe vari patsoka dzavo. Rudo ndirwo danho rekutanga, asi igwa rinofanira kunge rakasimba, uye zvakakosha kugara uchizadza mafuta.
London Metropolitan University yakaita ongororo pakati pevakaroora vakagara vese kwemakore mazhinji. Vanobvuma kuti kubudirira kweroorano yavo kunotsamira zvikuru paperero nemudzimu weboka pane kudisa.
Tinoona rudo rworudo sechinhu chinokosha pamuchato unofadza, asi izvi hazvina kunaka. Muchato chibvumirano, chave chichionekwa kwemazana emakore akawanda rudo rusati rwaonekwa sechinhu chikuru chayo. Ehe, rudo runogona kuenderera kana ruchizochinja kuita mubatanidzwa unobudirira wakavakirwa pane zvakagovaniswa hunhu uye nekuremekedzana.
2. Tinofanira kuita zvose pamwe chete
Kune vakaroorana vanonzi vane "mweya mumwe chete kumiviri miviri." Murume nomudzimai vanoita zvose pamwe chete uye kunyange nedzidziso havagoni kufungidzira kuparara kwehukama. Kune rumwe rutivi, iyi ndiyo yakanaka iyo vazhinji vanoshuvira. Kune rumwe rutivi, kubviswa kwekusiyana, kuzvinyima nzvimbo yako pachako uye pekugara kwemamiriro ezvinhu kunogona kureva kufa kwechido chepabonde. Chinodyisa rudo hachidyise chido.
“Tinoda mumwe munhu anotisvitsa kuchikamu chakadzika uye chakavanzwa zvikurusa chedu,” anotsanangura kudaro muzivi Umberto Galimberti. Tinokwezvwa kune zvatisingagoni kusvika, izvo zvinotinzvenga. Iyi ndiyo nzira yerudo.
Munyori webhuku rinonzi "Varume vanobva kuMars, vakadzi vanobva kuVenus" John Grey anowedzera pfungwa yake: "Passion inoputika kana mumwe wako akaita chimwe chinhu pasina iwe, pachivande uye panzvimbo yekuswedera pedyo, zvinova zvisinganzwisisike, zvisinganzwisisike."
Chinhu chikuru ndechekuchengetedza nzvimbo yako. Funga nezvehukama nemumwe wako sesutu yemakamuri ane mikova yakawanda inogona kuvhurwa kana kuvharwa, asi isina kuvharwa.
3. Wanano chinhu chinokosha chinosanganisira kuvimbika
Tiri murudo. Tinokurudzirwa kuti kana taroorana, ticharamba takatendeka kune mumwe nemumwe mukufunga, kutaura uye kuita. Asi ndizvo chaizvo here?
Muchato hausi mushonga, haudziviriri pachishuwo, haubvisi muchinguva chimwechete kukwezvwa kunoitwa nemunhu waasingazivi. Kuvimbika isarudzo yekuziva: tinosarudza kuti hapana munhu uye hapana chakakosha kunze kwemudiwa wedu, uye zuva nezuva tinoramba tichisarudza mudiwa.
“Ndaiva nomumwe wandaishanda naye wandaida chaizvo,” anodaro Maria ane makore 32. Ndakatomboedza kumunyengerera. Ndakabva ndafunga kuti: “Muchato wangu wakafanana nejeri kwandiri! Ipapo ndipo pandakaona kuti hapana chinhu chinokosha, kunze kwoukama hwedu nomurume wangu, kuvimba uye unyoro kwaari.”
4. Kuva nevana kunosimbisa imba
Chiyero chekugara zvakanaka kwemhuri chinoderera mushure mekuberekwa kwevana uye hachidzokeri kunzvimbo dzayo dzekare kusvikira mwana akura abuda mumba kuti atange hupenyu hwakazvimirira. Vamwe varume vanozivikanwa kuti vanonzwa vanyengedzwa pashure pokuberekwa kwomwanakomana, uye vamwe vakadzi vanofuratira varume vavo ndokuisa ngwariro zvizere pabasa ravo idzva saamai. Kana muchato wava kutoparara, kuita mwana kunogona kuva shanga rekupedzisira.
John Gray anotaura mubhuku rake kuti ngwariro iyo vana vanoda kazhinji kazhinji inova manyuko efunganyo nenharo. Nokudaro, hukama hwevakaroorana hunofanira kuva hwakasimba musati "muedzo wemwana" wavawira. Iwe unofanirwa kuziva kuti kusvika kwemwana kuchachinja zvinhu zvose, uye gadzirira kugamuchira dambudziko iri.
5. Munhu wese anogadzira mhuri yake muenzaniso
Vanhu vazhinji vanofunga kuti nemuchato unogona kutanga zvese kubva pakutanga, kusiya zvakapfuura uye kutanga mhuri itsva. Vabereki vako vaiva mahippies here? Musikana akakurira munhamo achagadzira yake imba diki asi yakasimba. Upenyu hwemhuri hwakavakirwa pakuomesera uye chirango? Peji inotenderedzwa, ichipa nzvimbo kurudo nekunyorova. Muhupenyu, hazvina kudaro. Hazvisi nyore kubvisa iyo miitiro yemhuri, maererano nezvataigara muhuduku. Vana vanotevedzera maitiro evabereki vavo kana kuita zvakapesana, kazhinji vasingatombozvizivi.
“Ndakarwira mhuri yechivanhu, muchato muchechi uye kubhabhatidzwa kwevana. Ndine imba yakanaka, ndiri nhengo yemasangano maviri anobatsira, Anna ane makore makumi matatu nemasere anogovana. "Asi zvinoita sekunge zuva rega rega ndinonzwa kuseka kwaamai vangu, vanondishoropodza nekuva chikamu che" system". Uye handikwanise kudada nezvandawana nekuda kweizvi. ”
Kuita sei? Kugamuchira nhaka kana kuti zvishoma nezvishoma kuikurira? Mhinduro iri munzira iyo vakaroorana vanopinda nayo, kushandura chokwadi chakafanana zuva nezuva, nokuti rudo (uye hatifaniri kukanganwa izvi) haisi chikamu chewanano chete, asiwo chinangwa chayo.