Zvinotyisa, mutambo, nyaya yerudo kana mufananidzo wakachenjera - zviroto zvakasiyana kwazvo. Uye ese anogona kutibatsira kufamba muhupenyu chaihwo. Kune nzira dzakawanda dzekudzidudzira, uye dzakawanda dzinogona kubatsira mukushanda nadzo uri wega. Nyanzvi yezvepfungwa Kevin Anderson anopa nyaya zvidzidzo uye mazano kune avo vanofarira kunzwisisa zviroto zvavo.
“Ndave ndichirota zvisinganzwisisike mazuva ano. Hadzisi hope dzinotyisa chaidzo, kungoti ndiri kurota zvisinganzwisisike zvekuti ndinotanga kukahadzika kuti zvinhu zvese zvakandinakira here. Somuenzaniso, munguva ichangopfuura ndakarota mumwe munhu akati kwandiri: “Handidaviri kuti wakaenda kumakuva uri woga. Zvinozivikanwa kuti ruoko rwakachekwa mumakuva runoora uye runobudisa magasi ane chepfu. Ndinofanira kutsvaga zvinoreva marara akadaro here? Ndinoziva kuti nyanzvi dzepfungwa dzinoona zviroto zvakakosha, asi zvinondityisa, "akadaro mumwe wevatengi kuna chiremba wepfungwa Kevin Anderson.
Masayendisiti mazhinji angati nyaya dzezviroto dzakaumbwa semhedzisiro yezvinoitika zvemasero europi panguva yekurara. Asi maonero aya haasati achitongova ane mufungo kupfuura kutaura kwaFreud kwokuti zviroto isuo rinoenda kuna vasina chavanoziva. Nyanzvi dzichiri kukakavara pamusoro pekuti kurota kunoreva chimwe chinhu chakakosha uye, kana zvakadaro, chii chaizvo. Zvisinei, hapana anoramba kuti zviroto chikamu chechiitiko chedu. Anderson anotenda kuti takasununguka kufunga zvine hungwaru pamusoro pavo kuitira kuti titore mhedziso, kukura kana kupora.
Kwemakore anoda kusvika 35, akateerera nyaya dzevarwere pamusoro pezviroto zvavo uye haamboregi kushamiswa nehuchenjeri hunoshamisa hunobudiswa nevasingazivi kuburikidza nemitambo yemunhu, inozivikanwa kwatiri sezviroto. Mumwe wevatengi vake aive murume aigara achizvienzanisa nababa vake. Muchiroto chake, akapedzisira ave pamusoro pedenga repamusoro kuti atarise baba vake uye aone kuti ivo ... vari kumusoro zvakare. Ipapo akatendeukira kuna amai vake vakamira pasi: “Ndingaburuka here?” Mushure mekukurukura nezvechiroto ichi nemumwe chiremba wepfungwa, akasiya basa raaifunga kuti baba vake vanganakidzwa nazvo ndokuenda zvake.
Zvinonakidza zviratidzo zvinogona kuonekwa muzviroto. Mumwe murume wechiduku akaroora akarota kudengenyeka kwenyika kwakanga kwaputsa temberi muguta rokumusha kwake. Akafamba nemumarara akadanidzira, "Pane munhu pano?" Muchikamu, Kevin Anderson akawana kuti mudzimai wemutengi wake angave ane pamuviri. Hurukuro dzevakaroorana pamusoro pekuti hupenyu hwavo huchachinja sei mushure mekuzvarwa kwemwana zvakatungamira kune yekugadzira dimikira kugadzirisa pfungwa idzi muchiroto.
“Pandakanga ndichinetseka nerondedzero yangu, handina kukwanisa kusarudza munzira ipi neipi mubvunzo unokosha: kusarudza nzvimbo “yemari” kana kuti kudzokera kutaundi rokumusha kwangu nomudzimai wangu ndokuwana basa ikoko mune imwe yemakiriniki. Panguva iyi ndakarota mapurofesa angu achiba ngarava nepfuti. Muchinoitika chinotevera, bvudzi rangu rakagerwa uye ndakaendeswa kune wairatidzika somusasa wechibharo. Ndakaedza chose kutiza. Zvinoita sekuti yangu «mugadziri wezviroto» akaenda pamusoro achiedza kundipa yakajeka meseji inobvira. Kwemakore 30 apfuura, ini nomudzimai wangu tave tichigara mutaundi rokumusha kwedu,” anonyora kudaro Kevin Anderson.
Izvo zvinofanirwa kuyeukwa kuti zviitiko zvese muchiroto zvine hypertrophied mune zvakasikwa.
Maererano naye, hapana nzira imwechete yakarurama yekududzira zviroto. Anopa akati wandei matipi anomubatsira mubasa rake nevarwere:
1. Usatsvaga dudziro yakarurama chete. Edza kutamba nezvakawanda zvingasarudzwa.
2. Rega kurota kwako kuve pekutangira kwekunakidzwa uye kunoreva kuongorora hupenyu. Kunyange kana zviri kuitika muchiroto zvichiita sezviri pachena uye zvakajeka, zvinogona kukutungamirira kune pfungwa itsva, dzimwe nguva dzakanyanya kugadzira.
3. Bata zviroto senyaya dzakachenjera. Muchiitiko ichi, unogona kuwana zvinhu zvakawanda zvinobatsira uye zvinonakidza mavari izvo zvine chokuita nehupenyu hwako chaihwo. Zvichida vanotibatanidza ne "higher unconscious" - icho chikamu chedu chakapiwa huchenjeri hunopfuura kuziva.
4. Ongorora chinhu chinoshamisa chaunoona muchiroto. Anderson anotenda kuti zvakanyanya kushamisa muzviroto, zvakanyanya kubatsira kwavanounza. Iwe unongoda kuyeuka kuti zviitiko zvese muchiroto zvine hypertrophied. Kana tikarota kuti tiri kuuraya munhu, tinofanira kufunga nezvehasha dzatinonzwa kumunhu uyu. Kana, sechikamu chechirongwa, tinoita zvepabonde nemumwe munhu, saka zvichida tine chido chekuswedera pedyo, uye kwete hazvo mumuviri.
5. Hapana chikonzero chekuvimba nepasi rose zviratidzo zvekurota zvinowanikwa mumabhuku. Maitiro aya, anonyora Anderson, anoreva kuti kana vanhu vaviri vakarota kamba, zvinoreva chinhu chimwe kune vese. Asi zvakadiniko kudai mumwe aiva nekamba inodiwa somwana akafa uye nokudaro ndokumuzivisa nokukurumidza kuchokwadi chorufu, uye imwe yacho ichiita fekitari yesoup yekamba? Ko chiratidzo chekamba chingareva chinhu chimwe chete kune wese munhu here?
Manzwiro akabatana nemunhu kana chiratidzo kubva muchiroto achabatsira kuziva kuti ungadudzira sei.
Uchifunga nezvechiroto chinotevera, unogona kuzvibvunza kuti: “Chii chinonzi chiratidzo chakanyatsokodzera muupenyu hwangu? Nei chaizvo akazviratidza kuhope? Anderson anokurudzira kushandisa nzira yekusununguka yekubatana kwekufungisisa chero chinhu chinouya mupfungwa patinofunga nezvechiratidzo ichi. Izvi zvichabatsira kuburitsa zvayakabatana nazvo muhupenyu chaihwo.
6. Kana paine vanhu vazhinji muchiroto, edza kuiongorora sekunge mumwe nemumwe wevatambi chikamu chehunhu hwako. Zvinogona kufungidzirwa kuti zvese hazvina kungoerekana zvaitika. Kushamwaridzana kwakasununguka kuchakubatsirawo kuti unzwisise izvo mumwe nomumwe wevanhu vanorota vanogona kufananidzira muchokwadi.
7. Ngwarira manzwiro ako muchiroto. Nekunzwa kupi kwawakamuka mushure mekutora kusvetuka kwemawere - nekutya kana nepfungwa yekusunungurwa? Manzwiro akabatana nemunhu kana chiratidzo kubva muchiroto achabatsira kuziva kuti ungadudzira sei.
8. Tarisa zviroto zvako kana uri kupfuura munguva yakaoma kana yekuchinja muhupenyu hwako uye unofanirwa kuita sarudzo chaiyo. Kunobva kunze kwepfungwa dzedu dzine musoro unogona kunongedzera gwara chairo kana kupa ruzivo runobatsira.
9. Kana uine dambudziko rekuyeuka zviroto zvako, chengeta kanoti nepeni pamubhedha wako. Paunomuka, nyora pasi zvose zvaunorangarira. Izvi zvichabatsira kuendesa chiroto mundangariro dzenguva refu uye kushanda nazvo gare gare.
“Handizivi kuti kurota pamusoro peguva noruoko rwakachekwa kunorevei,” anobvuma kudaro Kevin Anderson. “Asi pamwe mamwe emazano aya achakubatsira kutamba nezvaanoreva. Zvichida iwe unoona kuti mumwe munhu anokosha, uyo panguva yakakodzera "akasvika" kwauri, ari kusiya hupenyu hwako. Asi iyi ingori imwe yesarudzo yekududzira chiroto ichi chinoshamisa. Nakidzwa nekuronga nemukana wakasiyana."
Nezve munyori: Kevin Anderson i psychotherapist uye murairidzi wehupenyu.