Mukati
Hyper mother: intensive mothering in question
Kurera vamwe zvakanyanya, kubereka vana kwenguva pfupi kune vamwe ... Kurara pamwe chete, kuyamwisa kwenguva refu, kutakura muchipfuramabwe, hazviratidzike sekureva epiphenomenon. Iyi pfungwa yokuva amai iri kunyatsogutsa mwana here? Takaenda sei kubva pamuenzaniso wemukadzi anoshingaira kusvika pakumukazve kwekukunda kwaamai? Nyaya inonzwisisika yekutenda nyanzvi uye nezvakawanda zvapupu zvevanaamai vanozviita ...
Intensive mothering, tsanangudzo isina kujeka
Ava vanaamai “vakazvarwa” ndivanaamai vakasarudza kurarama nepamuviri pavo, kuberekwa kwomwana wavo uye nzira yavo yokumudzidzisa nayo neshoko rimwe chete rokurindira: kuva vakazvipira chose chose kumwana wavo nezvinodikanwa zvake. Kutenda kwavo: chisungo chinorukwa nemwana mumwedzi yekutanga isimba repfungwa risingaperi. Vanodavira mukupa mwana wavo chengeteko chaiyoiyo yomukati, uye iyi ndiyo kiyi yedzikamo yake yemberi. Uku kunonzi kurera vana kwakasarudzika kana kuti kwakasimba kunosimudzira miitiro yakati inosimudzira chisungo chakasiyana cha“amai nomwana”. Isu tinowana ipapo pell-mell: kuimba pamberi pekuzvarwa, kuzvarwa kwepanyama, kuzvara pamba, kunonoka kuyamwisa, kurumurwa kwepanyama, kupfekedza mwana, kurara pamwe chete, ganda-ku-ganda, manapukeni anogezwa, chikafu cheorganic, hutsanana hwepanyama, nyoro uye imwe nzira yekurapa, dzidzo. pasina mhirizhonga, uye dzimwe nzira dzedzidzo dzakadai saFreinet, Steiner kana Montessori, kunyange dzidzo yemhuri.
Vamwe amai vanopupurira pamaforamu: “Saamai vemapatya, ndakavayamwisa ndichifara, munzvimbo inonzi “mhumhi”, yakarara nedivi pangu pamubhedha. Zvaive zvakanakisa. Ndakaita zvimwe chete kumwana wangu wechi3. Murume wangu anonditsigira pakuita izvi. I also tested chiputiriso chebeche, chirikunaka uye chinonyaradza vana. “
Kubva pakuchengeta vana "nenzira yakaoma" kuenda ku "hypermaternantes"
Tsika ye proximal mothering yakabuda mhiri kweAtlantic. Mumwe weanotungamira manhamba ndiChiremba wevana wekuAmerica William Sears, munyori weshoko rekuti "attachment parenting". Iyi pfungwa inobva padzidziso yekubatana yakagadziridzwa naJohn Bowlby, chiremba wepfungwa wechiRungu uye psychoanalyst, akafa muna 1990. Kwaari, kuda chimwe chezvinodikanwa zvikuru zvomwana muduku, zvakadai sokudya kana kuti kurara. Ndipo chete apo zvaanoda zvekuva pedyo zvazadzikiswa ndipo paanogona kubva kure nechimiro chevabereki chinomuchengetedza kuti aongorore nyika. Kwemakore gumi nemashanu takaona shanduko : kubva kumuenzaniso unokurudzira kurega mucheche achichema, kwete kumutora pamubhedha wake, zvishoma nezvishoma takatamira kune zvakasiyana. Kurera mwana, kunonoka kuyamwisa kana kurara pamwe chete kune vateveri vakawanda.
Vamwe amai vanopupurira chikumbiro chavo chokupindura kumufananidzo chaiwo waamai vari amai: “Kuputira, hongu ndakazviita, ndichiyamwisawo, kurara mubhegi rokurarisa hungu uye, pamusoro pazvo, tose tiri vaviri baba neni, sikavha aiwa ndaifarira kuva nayo. mumaoko angu kana mujasi rangu. Kune mutauro wemasaini yakakosha, Naïss iri mumakirabhu maviri "chiratidzo nemaoko ako" uye chechipiri "maoko madiki", uye zvakadaro handisi matsi kana mbeveve. “
Kusangana nezvinodiwa nevacheche
Nyanzvi Claude Didier Jean Jouveau, aimbove purezidhendi weLeche League uye munyori wemabhuku akati wandei pamusoro pekuyamwisa, ave nemakore achinzwisisa uye achitsigira ava vanonzi vanaamai “hyper maternal”. Anotsanangura kuti: “Amai ivava vari kungogamuchira chinodikanwa chomucheche chokutakurwa ndokupiwa zvokudya pazvinoda. Ini handisi kunzwisisa taboo iyi muFrance nepo kune dzimwe nyika zvese zvinoita senge zvakajairika ”. Vanoenderera mberi vachiti: “Kana mwana wevanhu azvarwa, tinoziva kuti kukura mumuviri hakuna kukwana. Anthropologists vanoidaidza kuti "ex-utero fetus". Zvinoita sokuti mwana wevanhu akanga aberekwa nguva isati yakwana kunyange zvazvo yakasvika pakupera munhamba yevhiki dzokuti ainorrhea. Mukuenzanisa nevana vemhuka, mwana wevanhu achada makore maviri panguva yaanowana kuzvitonga, nepo mhuru semuenzaniso inozvimiririra nekukurumidza mushure mekuzvarwa ".
Tora mwana wako akurwise, muyamwise, ipfeke nguva zhinji, ichengetedze padyo newe husiku… kwaari, uku kurera amai kwenguva pfupi kwakakosha uye kwakatokosha. Nyanzvi hainzwisise kusada kwedzimwe nyanzvi. , "Gore rokutanga panofanira kuva nekuenderera mberi mushure mekuita pamuviri, mucheche anofanira kunzwa kuti amai vake vanomubatsira kukura".
Ngozi dze hypermaternage
Sylvain Missonnier, psychoanalyst uye purofesa wekiriniki psychopathology yekuchengeta perinatal paYunivhesiti yeParis-V-René-Descartes, akanyanya kuchengetwa pamberi peiyi yakadzika amai. Mubhuku rake “Becoming a parent, born human. Iyo chaiyo diagonal ”yakaburitswa muna 2009, anoburitsa imwe pfungwa yekuona: kwaari, mwana anofanira kurarama akatevedzanakupatsanurwa miedzo as kuberekwa, kurumurwa, kudzidziswa chimbuzi, izvo matanho anokosha ekugadzirira mwana kutora kuzvitonga kwake. Uyu munyori anotora muenzaniso we "ganda kune ganda" rinoitwa nguva refu, rinoonekwa sechipo pakudzidza kwakakosha kwevacheche, iko kwekuparadzana. Kwaari, maitiro edzidzo haagone kuvapo pasina kuisa kupatsanurwa uku. Mamwe maitiro anopawo njodzi yemuviri. Kurara pamwe chete semuenzaniso, izvo zvinowedzera mukana wekufa kamwe kamwe kana mwana avete pamubhedha wevabereki. IFrench Pediatric Society inoyeuka pamusoro penyaya iyi maitiro akanaka ekurara kwevacheche: pamusana, mubhegi rekurara uye pamubhedha usina chinhu sezvinobvira pane mattress yakaoma. Vanamazvikokota vari kunetsekawo nezvenyaya shoma dzerufu rwakangoerekana rwaitika apo mwana akatakurwa muchipfuramabwe.
Vamwe vanaamai vanopupura neshungu vachipokana nemaitiro aya pamaforamu uye kwete chete njodzi inouraya yekurara pamwe chete: "Handina kudzidzira rudzi urwu rwenzira uye kunyange kushoma" kurara pamwe chete ". Kuita kuti mwana arare pamubhedha mumwe chete nevabereki kupa vana tsika dzakaipa. Mumwe nemumwe ane mubhedha wake, mwana wangu ane wake isu tine wedu. Ndinofunga kuti zviri nani kuchengeta kushamwaridzana kwevakaroorana. Ndinoona izwi rekuti mai kune chikamu changu risinganzwisisike, nekuti izwi iri harisanganisire baba zvachose uye ndicho chimwe chezvikonzero chakaita kuti ndisayamwisa zvakadaro. “
Chimiro chevakadzi mu hypermaternage
Nyaya iyi inomutsa mibvunzo pamusoro pemigumisiro yezviito izvi, izvo zvinonyanya kukosha kumadzimai, pamusoro pehuwandu hwevakadzi. Ndivanaani vana mama vakanyengwa na intensive mothering ? Vamwe vavo vakapedza kudzidza uye vanowanzosiya nyika yekushanda vachitevera zororo rekusununguka. Vanotsanangura kuti kwakaoma sei kwavari kuyananisa upenyu hwemhuri yavo nezvipingamupinyi zveunyanzvi uye chiono chinoda zvikuru chokuva amai nemamwe mabasa. Iri idanho rekudzokera kumashure sezvakataurwa naElisabeth Badinter mubhuku rake "Kupokana: mukadzi naamai" rakabudiswa muna 2010? Muzivi anoshora a reactionary kutaura iyo inoganhurira vakadzi kumabasa avo savanaamai, semuenzaniso zvaanofunga kuti diktat maererano nekuyamwisa. Muzivi nokudaro anoshora muenzaniso waamai wakaremerwa nekariro dzakawanda, ganhuriro, uye mitoro nokuda kwavakadzi.
Chokwadi tinogona kuzvibvunza kuti kusvika papi vanaamai ava "hyper" havatsvaki kutiza nyika yebasa inoonekwa seinonetsa uye isingapi mubayiro, uye isingatarisi chimiro chavo saamai zvakakwana. A hyper motherity ane ruzivo nenzira seyekupotera munyika iri munhamo uye izere nekusava nechokwadi.