Vanorwira kodzero dzevanhukadzi vanowanzopomerwa kurwisa zvinhu zvinoita sezvisina kukosha. Somuenzaniso, vanorambidza varume kubhadhara mari muresitorendi, kuvavhurira masuo uye kuvabatsira kupfeka mabhachi avo. Kuisa parutivi dzimwe nyaya dzose dzinotariswa nevechikadzi, uye funga nezvemubvunzo unonyanya kufarirwa nevanhu vazhinji: sei vamwe vakadzi vachipesana nevarume vachivabhadhara?
Ngano yokuti vanhukadzi vanorwisana nechivalry yevarume uye mitambo yepakati-yevakadzi inowanzoshandiswa segakava rekuti feminists haakwani uye haawirirani nechokwadi. Ndosaka, vanodaro, vachitsaurira upenyu hwavo kukurwisana nemhepo, kumatare edzimhosva varume vaivapa majasi, uye kumera bvudzi mumakumbo avo. Uye chimiro che "feminists vanorambidza" chatova meme uye classic ye anti-feminist rhetoric.
Iyi nharo, kune zvese zvekutanga kwayo, inoshanda chaizvo. Kuteerera kune zvidiki izvo zvinokanganisa veruzhinji, zviri nyore kutsausa pfungwa kubva kuchinhu chikuru. Kubva pane zviri kurwisana nesangano refeminist. Semuenzaniso, kubva mukusaenzana, kusaruramisira, mhirizhonga yevakadzi, mhirizhonga yekubereka uye mamwe matambudziko ayo vatsoropodzi vevakadzi vasingadi kuona.
Zvisinei, ngatidzokere kubhachi redu neresitorendi bhiri uye tione kuti zvinhu zvakamira sei nechivalry, tarisiro yevakadzi uye feminism. Tine solitaire here? Ko vezvechikadzi vanofungei chaizvo pamusoro peizvi?
Kugumbusa account
Musoro wekuti ndiani anobhadharwa pazuva nderimwe remisoro inopisa munhaurirano dzevakadzi, zvechikadzi kana kwete. Uye vakadzi vazhinjisa, pasinei zvapo nemirangariro yavo, vanobvumirana pane imwe nzira yapose pose: “Ndinogara ndakagadzirira kuzvibhadharira ndimene, asi ndinoda kuti murume azviite.” Iyi fomula inogona kusiyana kubva ku “Ndinoida” kuenda ku “Ini handingaendi pazuva rechipiri kana akasabhadhara pazuva rekutanga,” asi zvinongoramba zvakadaro.
Zvishoma vakadzi vane pfungwa dzemadzibaba vanowanzo zivisa nzvimbo yavo nekuzvikudza uye pachena. Vanotenda kuti murume anofanira kubhadhara, nekuda kwekuti iye murume uye nokuti chikamu chinokosha chemutambo wepabonde, mumwe mutemo usingazununguki wekubatana kwevanhu.
Vakadzi vanowanzotarisa maonero evakadzi vanowanzonyara zvishoma nemafungiro avo, vanonzwa rumwe rudzi rwekupesana kwemukati uye vanotya kutsamwa kwekupikisa - "Chii chaunoda kudya nehove, uye usapinda mumvura?". Tarisa uone mercantile - uye kumupa kodzero dzakaenzana, uye kubhadhara mabhiri muresitorendi, akawana basa rakanaka.
Hapana kupokana pano, zvisinei, nokuda kwechikonzero chimwe chakapfava. Pasinei nemaonero anoita mukadzi, chokwadi chedu chine hutsinye chiri kure kwazvo nepost-patriarchal utopia, apo varume nevakadzi vakaenzana zvachose, vane mukana wakafanana wekuwana zviwanikwa uye vanopinda mune yakachinjika, kwete yehukama hukama.
Isu tose, varume nevakadzi, zvibereko zvenyika yakasiyana zvachose. Nzanga yatiri kurarama iye zvino inogona kunzi nzanga inochinja. Vakadzi, kune rumwe rutivi, vakakunda kodzero yekuve vagari vakazara, kuvhota, kushanda uye kurarama hupenyu hwakazvimirira, uye kune rumwe rutivi, vachiri kutakura mutoro wese wekuwedzera unowira pamapfudzi emukadzi classical patriarchal society: basa rekubereka, kuchengetedza imba kune vakwegura, basa remanzwiro uye maitiro erunako.
Mukadzi wemazuva ano anowanzo shanda uye anobatsira pakupa mhuri.
Asi panguva imwe cheteyo, anofanira kuva achiri amai vakanaka, mudzimai ane ushamwari uye asinganetseki, anotarisira imba, vana, murume uye hama dzakura, kuva akanaka, akashongedzwa zvakanaka uye anonyemwerera. Kutenderera wachi, pasina kudya kwemasikati uye mazuva ekuzorora. Uye pasina mubairo, nekuda kwekuti "anofanira". Murume, kune rumwe rutivi, anogona kuzvivharira kushanda uye akatsamira pamubhedha, uye mukuona kwevanhu achange atova munhu akanaka, baba vakanaka, murume akanaka kwazvo uye anowana mari.
"Mazuva nemabhiri zvinei nazvo?" - iwe unobvunza. Uye pasinei nokuti mumamiriro ezvinhu aripo, mukadzi chero upi zvake, mukadzi kana kwete, anoziva zvechokwadi kuti ukama nemurume hunogona kuda mari yakawanda yezviwanikwa kubva kwaari. Zvakawanda kupfuura kubva kune mumwe wake. Uye kuitira kuti hukama uhwu huve hunobatsira zvishoma kumukadzi, unofanirwa kuwana humbowo hwekuti murume akagadzirirawo kugovera zviwanikwa, zvirinani muchimiro chakadaro chekufananidzira.
Imwe pfungwa inokosha inobva mukusaruramisira kumwe cheteko kuripo. Murumewo zvake ane zviwanikwa zvakawanda kudarika mukadziwo zvake. Varume, maererano nenhamba, vanogamuchira mihoro yakakwira, vanowana zvinzvimbo zvepamusoro uye, kazhinji, zviri nyore kwavari kukwira manera ebasa uye kuwana mari. Varume kazhinji havagoverani mutoro wakaenzana kuvana mushure mekurambana uye naizvozvowo vari munzvimbo ine ropafadzo huru.
Uye zvakare, mune yedu isiri-utopian chaiyo, murume asina kugadzirira kubhadharira mukadzi waanoda mucafe haafanire kuzove mutsigiri wenheyo wekuenzana, kunze kwekunzwa kwekururamisira uyo anoda kugovera zvachose. mabasa ose uye mari zvakaenzana.
Unicorns ne theoretically iripo, asi muchokwadi chine hutsinye, isu tingangove tichibata nemurume akazara murume anongoda kudya hove nekukwira bhiza. Chengetedza ropafadzo dzako dzose uye ubvise zvekupedzisira, kunyange mabasa ekufananidzira, munzira "kutora kutsiva" kune vevakadzi nekuda kwekuti vanototsunga kutaura nezvemamwe marudzi ekodzero dzakaenzana. Zvakanaka chaizvo, shure kwezvose: chaizvoizvo, isu hatisi kuzoshandura chero chinhu, asi kubva zvino ini handina chikwereti newe zvachose, iwe pachako waida izvi, handiti?
Wrong bhachi
Uye zvakadini nezvimwe zviratidzo zvegallantry? Ivo, zvakare, vakadzikadzi, zvinobuda, vanotendera? Asi pano zvinhu zvose zvishoma zvakaoma. Kune rimwe divi, chero kuratidzwa kwekutarisira kune chikamu chemurume, senge bhiri rakabhadharwa rinotsanangurwa pamusoro, chimwe chisimbiso chidiki chekuti murume, mumutemo, akagadzirira kuisa mari muhukama, anokwanisa kutarisira uye kunzwira tsitsi, kwete taura nezvorupo rwomudzimu. Uye izvi, zvechokwadi, zvakanaka uye zvinofadza - isu tose tiri vanhu uye tinozvida pavanotiitira chimwe chinhu chakanaka.
Mukuwedzera, iyi mitambo yose yepabonde ndeye, chaizvoizvo, tsika yemagariro yatakajaira kubva pauduku. Yakaratidzwa kwatiri mumafirimu uye yakatsanangurwa mumabhuku pasi pe "rudo rukuru uye chido." Iyo inokwenya tsinga zvinofadza, chikamu chekutamba uye kupfimbana, kunonoka kusangana kwevasingazivi vaviri. Uye kwete chikamu chisingafadzi zvakanyanya, ndinofanira kutaura.
Asi pano, zvisinei, pane zvipingamupinyi zviviri, izvo, chaizvoizvo, ngano iyo "vakadzi vanorambidza jasi" yakabva. Dombo rekutanga - ese aya maratidziro akanaka ehuremekedzo akanyanya zvisaririra kubva panguva iyo mukadzi aionekwa sechisikwa chisina simba uye benzi, anenge mwana anoda kutsigirwa uye haafanire kutorwa zvakanyanya. Uye kusvika zvino, mune mamwe maitiro ane simba, anoverengwa: "Ndiri kutungamira pano, ini ndichakuchengeta kubva pafudzi ratenzi, chidhori changu chisina musoro."
Subtext yakadaro inouraya zvachose chero mafaro kubva mukuita.
Musungo wechipiri ndewokuti varume vanowanzokarira rudzi rwakati rwe“muripo” mukupindura zviito zvavo zvengwariro, kazhinji kazhinji zvisina kuenzana chose chose. Vakadzi vazhinji vanoziva nezvemamiriro ezvinhu aya - akakutorera kofi, akavhura gonhi remota pamberi pako, zvinyoro akakanda jasi pamapfudzi ake uye nekuda kwechimwe chikonzero anoramba achitenda kuti nezviito izvi akato "kubhadhara" kubvumirwa kuita zvepabonde. . Kuti iwe hauna kodzero yekuramba, iwe wakato "kugamuchira" zvose izvi, iwe unogona sei? Zvinosuruvarisa, mamiriro ezvinhu akadaro haasi nguva dzose asina kukuvadza uye anogona kutungamirira kumigumisiro isingafadzi.
Ndicho chikonzero kudzivisa gallantry hakusi chido chevakadzi vane hutsinye, asi inzira inonzwisisika yekubatana nekure kubva kune chokwadi chakaenzana. Zviri nyore kuzarura musuo iwe pachako uye kubhadhara kofi pane kutsanangurira mutorwa kwemaawa maviri kuti iwe haudi uye haungarari naye, uye panguva imwechete unonzwa se mercantile bitch. Zviri nyore kupfeka zvipfeko zvako zvekunze uye kusundira chigaro chako kumashure pane kunzwa neganda rako kuti uri kubatwa semusikana asina musoro.
Zvisinei, vazhinji vedu vevakadzi vanoramba vachitamba mitambo yevakadzi nekunakidzwa (uye kumwe kuchenjerera) - pamwe tichinakidzwa nazvo, pamwe tichifunga kuti inzira yepamutemo yekuvepo muchokwadi chiri kure kwazvo kubva kune post-patriarchal yakanaka.
Ndinogona kuvimbisa kuti panzvimbo ino mumwe munhu achadzipwa nehasha obva ati: “Zvakanaka, vezvechikadzi vanoda kurwa chete nezvikamu zveubaba zvakavaomera? Uye izvi, zvichida, zvichava tsanangudzo yakarurama yevakadzi.