"Kuponeswa kubva mukutukwa kwose kuri mukukanganwa", "Geza kutukwa kwakagamuchirwa kwete muropa, asi muZhizha", "Usamboyeuka kutuka kwekare" - vekare vakadaro. Nei tisinganyanyi kutevera mazano avo uye tichiaisa mumwoyo medu kwemavhiki, mwedzi, uye kunyange makore? Pamwe nekuti zvakanaka kuvapa chikafu, kuvaroora uye kuvakoshesa? Kugunun'una kwekare kunogona kukonzera kukanganisa kwakakura kuhutano hwemuviri uye hwepfungwa, izvo zvinoreva kuti iwe unoda kutsvaga nzira yekuzvibvisa, anonyora Tim Herrera.
Chimwe chezvandinofarira kuita pamapati kubvunza vaenzi mubvunzo uri nyore: "Chigumbu chako chekare, chaunokoshesa?" Chii chandisina kunzwa pakupindura! Vatauriri vangu vanowanzo taura zvakananga. Mumwe haana kukwidziridzwa zvisina kufanira pabasa, mumwe haakanganwi kutaura kwakashata. Chechitatu kuona chokwadi chekuti ushamwari hwekare hwave husingachashandi. Pasinei nokuti chiitiko chacho chingaita sechisingakoshi sei, chigumbu chinogona kugara mumwoyo kwemakore.
Ndinoyeuka shamwari ichigovera nyaya mukupindura mubvunzo. Akanga ari mugiredhi rechipiri, uye mumwe wandakadzidza naye—shamwari yangu achiri kuyeuka zita rake uye zvaairatidzika—akaseka magirazi shamwari yangu yakatanga kupfeka. Hakusi kuti mwana uyu akataura chimwe chinhu chakaipa, asi shamwari yangu haigoni kukanganwa chiitiko ichocho.
Kugumbuka kwedu kwakafanana neTamagotchi muhomwe yedu yemanzwiro: vanofanirwa kudyiswa nguva nenguva. Sekuona kwangu, mutambi Reese Witherspoon akazvitaura zvakanyanya kupfuura zvese muTV inoteedzana Big Little Lies: “Uye ndinoda zvichemo zvangu. Vakafanana nemhuka dzinovaraidza kwandiri. " Asi zvichemo izvi zvinotipei uye tichawanei kana tikazoonekana nazvo?
Ini nguva pfupi yadarika ndakabvunza vashandisi ve Twitter kana vakamboregerera magumbu ekare uye manzwiro avakaita semhedzisiro. Hedzinoi dzimwe mhinduro.
- “Pandakasvitsa makore makumi matatu, ndakafunga kuti yakanga yava nguva yokukanganwa zvakaitika kare. Ndakaronga kuchenesa mumusoro mangu - nzvimbo yakawanda yakasunungurwa!
- “Hakusi kuti ndainzwa chimwe chinhu chakakosha… Zvaifadza kuti hapana chainyanya kundinetsa, asi pakanga pasisina kana imwe pfungwa yekuzorora.”
- "Nenzira imwe chete ndakaregerera mhosva ... mushure mekunge ndatsiva kune akanditadzira!"
- "Ehe, pakanga paine zororo, asi pamwe chete nazvo - uye chimwe chinhu chakaita sekuparadza. Zvakazoitika kuti zvainakidza kuchengeta zvichemo.
- Ndakanzwa ndakasununguka. Zvinoitika kuti ndanga ndiine chigumbu kwemakore mazhinji ... "
- “Kukanganwira kwakazova chimwe chezvidzidzo zvinokosha zvikuru muupenyu hwangu!”
- “Ndakaerekana ndanzwa semunhu mukuru chaiye. Ndakabvuma kuti pane imwe nguva, pandakagumburwa, manzwiro angu akanga akakodzera chaizvo, asi nguva yakawanda yapfuura, ndakakura, ndave ndakachenjera uye ndakagadzirira kutaura zvakanaka kwavari. Ndakanzwa kurerukirwa chaiko! Ndinoziva kuti zvinoita senge cliché, asi ndizvo zvazvaive. "
Hongu, zvamazvirokwazvo, inoratidzika kuva yakashata, asi inotsigirwa noufakazi hwesayenzi. Kare muna 2006, masayendisiti eStanford akaburitsa zvakabuda muongororo yaiti, "kugona hunyanzvi hwekuregerera, unogona kutsungirira nehasha, kuderedza kushushikana uye kuratidzwa kwepfungwa." Kuregerera kwakanakira immune system yedu uye yemoyo.
Ongororo kubva gore rino, 2019, inoshuma kuti avo, kusvika pakuchembera, vanonzwa hasha pamusoro pechimwe chinhu chakaitika kare-kare vanotarirwa nezvirwere zvisingaperi. Mumwe mushumo unoti hasha dzinotitadzisa kuona mamiriro acho ezvinhu nemaziso omumwe munhu.
Patisingagoni kuchema ndokurega zvakaitika, tinova neshungu, uye ikoku kunotapura chimiro chedu chomudzimu nendangariro. Hezvino izvo munzveri wokukanganwira Dr. Frederic Laskin anotaura pamusoro paikoku: “Patinoziva kuti hapana chatinogona kuita kunze kwokuramba takachengeta pfundepfunde yekare uye kutakura hasha matiri timene, ikoku kunonetesa gadziriro yedu yokuzvidzivirira kwomuviri uye kunogona kuparira kukura kwechigumbu. kuora mwoyo. Hasha ndiwo manzwiro anoparadza zvakanyanya kuhurongwa hwedu hwemwoyo. "
Rega kutaura uye kuzvifunga iwe semunhu akabatwa nemamiriro ezvinhu
Asi kukanganwira kwakazara, maererano nemusayendisiti, kunogona kuderedza migumisiro yakaipa iyo kugumbuka kwenguva refu uye kutsamwa kwekutsamwa kune kwatiri.
Zvakanaka, nenyaya yekuti kubvisa chigumbu kwakanaka uye kunobatsira, takazvifunga. Asi sei chaizvo kuzviita? Dr. Laskin anotaura kuti kukanganwira kwakakwana kunogona kukamurwa kuita matanho mana. Asi usati wazviita, zvakakosha kunzwisisa zvinhu zvishoma zvakakosha:
- Unoda kuregererwa, kwete mutadzi.
- Nguva yakanakisa yekuregerera ndiyo zvino.
- Kukanganwira hazvirevi kubvuma kuti hapana chakaipa chakaitwa kwauri, kana kushamwaridzana nemunhu wacho zvakare. Rinoreva kuzvisunungura.
Saka, kuti uregerere, iwe unofanirwa kutanga wadzikama - iko zvino. Kutora kufema kwakadzika, kufungisisa, kumhanya, chero. Uku kuzvibvisa pane zvakaitika kwete kuita nekukasika uye nekukasika.
Chechipiri, rega kutaura uye kuzvifunga iwe senyajambwa wemamiriro ezvinhu. Nokuda kweizvi, hongu, iwe uchafanirwa kuita nhamburiko. Matanho maviri ekupedzisira anofambidzana. Funga nezvezvinhu zvakanaka muhupenyu hwako - izvo zvaungashandisa kuenzanisa kukuvadzwa kwawakaitwa kwauri - uye zviyeuchidze iwe nezve chokwadi chakapfava: kwete zvese muhupenyu uye hazvisi nguva dzose zvinobuda nenzira yatinoda. Izvi zvichabatsira kuderedza huwandu hwese hwekushushikana kwauri kusangana nako.
Kugona unyanzvi hwekukanganwira, kurega kuramba wakanamatira mukutsamwa kwemakore akawanda ndeyechokwadi, inoyeuchidza Dr. Laskin. Zvinongoda kudzidzira nguva dzose.
Munyori - Tim Herrera, mutori wenhau, mupepeti.