Ndeipi nguva yekuti mwana aone chiremba wepfungwa?

“Ndinogara ndichinetseka pamusoro pomwanasikana wangu ane makore matatu okukura,” anobvuma kudaro Lev ane makore 38 okukura. — Pane imwe nguva akaruma mukireshi, uye ndaitya kuti aisashamwaridzana nevanhu. Paanosvipira broccoli, ndinotoona kuti anorexia. Mudzimai wangu nachiremba wedu wevana vaigara vachindigadzika. Asi dzimwe nguva ndinofunga kuti zvichiri kukosha kuenda naye kuna chiremba wepfungwa. ”

Kusava nechokwadi kunotambudza Kristina ane makore 35, uyo ari kunetseka nezvemwanakomana wake ane makore mashanu achiti: “Ndinoona kuti mwana wedu ari kunetseka. Izvi zvinozviratidza mune psychosomatics, ikozvino, semuenzaniso, maoko ake nemakumbo ari kupemha. Ndinozviudza kuti izvi zvichapfuura, kuti hazvisi zvangu kuti ndichinje. Asi ndinorwadziwa nepfungwa yokuti ari kutambura.”

Chii chinomutadzisa kuona chiremba wepfungwa? “Ndinotya kunzwa kuti imhosva yangu. Ko kana ndikavhura bhokisi raPandora robva ranyanya kuipa… ndakarasikirwa nemabhengi angu uye handizive zvekuita.

Kuvhiringidzika uku kunowanzoitika kuvabereki vakawanda. Chii chokuvimba nacho, kusiyanisa pakati pezvinokonzerwa nematanho ekukura (somuenzaniso, matambudziko ekuparadzaniswa nevabereki), chii chinoratidza matambudziko maduku (kurota), uye chii chinoda kupindira kwenyanzvi yepfungwa?

Patakarasikirwa nemaonero akajeka emamiriro acho ezvinhu

Mwana anogona kuratidza zviratidzo zvekutambudzika kana kukonzera dambudziko kune vadiwa, asi izvi hazvirevi nguva dzose kuti dambudziko riri maari. Hazvishamisi kuti mwana "ashande sechiratidzo" - iyi ndiyo nzira iyo systemic mhuri psychotherapist inosarudza nhengo yemhuri inotora basa rekuratidza dambudziko remhuri.

“Kunogona kuzviratidza mumarudzi akasiyana-siyana,” inodaro nyanzvi yepfungwa dzevana Galiya Nigmetzhanova. Somuenzaniso, mwana anoruma nzara dzake. Kana kuti ane matambudziko asinganzwisisiki somatic: fivha shoma mangwanani, kukosora. Kana kuti anokanganisa: kurwa, kubvisa matoyi.

Nenzira imwe kana imwe, zvichienderana nezera rake, hunhu uye humwe hunhu, anoedza - asingazivi, hongu - "kunamira" hukama hwevabereki vake, nekuti anoda ivo vaviri. Kunetseka pamusoro pemwana kunogona kuvaunza pamwe chete. Ngavaite nharo kweawa imwe chete pamusoro pake, zvakakosha kwaari kuti vaiva pamwe chete panguva ino.

Kutendeukira kune chiremba wepfungwa kunokubvumira kuti unzwisise zviri nani mamiriro acho ezvinhu uye, kana zvichidiwa, tanga mhuri, yewanano, yemunhu kana yemwana kurapwa.

“Kushanda kunyange nemunhu mukuru mumwe chete kunogona kupa migumisiro yakanaka,” anodaro Galiya Nigmetzhanova. - Uye kana shanduko dzakanaka dzichitanga, mubereki wechipiri dzimwe nguva anouya kumabiko, uyo aimbove "asina nguva." Pashure penguva yakati, unobvunza: mwana ari sei, anoruma zvipikiri zvake? "Kwete, zvese zvakanaka."

Asi tinofanira kuyeuka kuti matambudziko akasiyana anogona kuvanzwa kuseri kwechiratidzo chimwe chete. Ngatitorei muenzaniso: mwana ane makore mashanu anoita misikanzwa manheru ega ega asati aenda kunorara. Izvi zvinogona kuratidza matambudziko ake ega: kutya kwerima, matambudziko mukireshi.

Kana kuti zvichida imhaka yemafungiro anopesana: amai vanoomerera kuti aende kunorara nokukurumidza, kunyange kana akanga asina nguva yekushambira, uye baba vanoda kuti aite imwe tsika vasati varara, uye somugumisiro, manheru. inoputika. Zvakaoma kuti vabereki vanzwisise chikonzero nei.

“Handina kufunga kuti kuva amai kwakanga kwakaoma kudaro,” anobvuma kudaro Polina ane makore 30 okukura. “Ndinoda kudzikama uye munyoro, asi ndinokwanisa kudzika miganhu. Kuva nemwana wako, asi kwete kumudzvinyirira ... Ndakaverenga zvakawanda pamusoro pekurera vana, ndinoenda kuzvidzidzo, asi zvakadaro handisi kuona kunze kwemhino dzangu.

Hazvishamisi kuti vabereki vanzwe varasika mugungwa remazano anopokana. "Kunyanya-ruzivo, asiwo asina ruzivo," sezvakataurwa naPatrick Delaroche, chiremba wepfungwa uye chiremba wepfungwa dzevana.

Tinoita sei nehanya yedu nevana vedu? Enda kunoona chiremba wepfungwa, anodaro Galiya Nigmetzhanova uye anotsanangura chikonzero nei: “Kana funganyo ikanzwika mumweya womubereki, zvirokwazvo ichatapura ukama hwake nomwana, uye nomudiwa wakewo. Tinofanira kuziva kuti kwakabva kupi. Haafanire kunge ari mucheche, kungava kusagutsikana kwake newanano yake kana kushungurudzika kwake kwehudiki. "

Patinorega kunzwisisa mwana wedu

“Mwanakomana wangu akaenda kuna chiremba wepfungwa kubva pamakore 11 kusvikira ku13 okukura,” anoyeuka kudaro Svetlana ane makore 40 okukura. - Pakutanga ndakanzwa ndine mhosva: sei kuti ndinobhadhara mutorwa pakuchengeta mwanakomana wangu?! Paive nekunzwa kuti ndinorerutsira mutoro, kuti ndiri amai vasina basa.

Asi chii chaifanira kuitwa kana ndikarega kunzwisisa mwana wangu? Nokufamba kwenguva, ndakakwanisa kusiya zvirevo zvemasimbaose. Ndinotodada kuti ndakakwanisa kugovera masimba. "

Vakawanda vedu tinomiswa nekusava nechokwadi: kukumbira rubatsiro, zvinoratidzika kwatiri, zvinoreva kusaina kuti hatigoni kutarisana nebasa remubereki. "Fungidzira: dombo rakavhara nzira yedu, uye isu takamirira kuti iende kune imwe nzvimbo," anodaro Galiya Nigmetzhanova.

- Vazhinji vanorarama seizvi, vakaomeswa nechando, "vasingaoni" dambudziko, mukutarisira kuti richazvigadzirisa pacharo. Asi kana tikaziva kuti tine “dombo” pamberi pedu, ipapo tinogona kuzvigadzirira nzira.

"Vabereki vanorega kunzwisisa vana kana vakaneta - zvakanyanya zvokuti havasati vagadzirira kuzarura chimwe chinhu chitsva mumwana, kumuteerera, kutsungirira matambudziko ake," anodaro Galiya Nigmetzhanova. - Nyanzvi ichakubatsira kuona izvo zvinokonzeresa kuneta uye nzira yekuzadza zviwanikwa zvako. Nyanzvi yepfungwa inoshandawo somuturikiri, ichibatsira vabereki nevana kuti vanzwe mumwe nomumwe.”

Mukuwedzera, mwana angawana “chinodikanwa chiri nyore chokutaura nomumwe munhu asiri womumhuri, asi nenzira isati iri ruzvidzo kuvabereki,” anowedzera kudaro Patrick Delaroche. Saka, usapopotera mwana nemibvunzo paanobva pachirongwa.

Kune Gleb ane makore masere, ane mapatya, zvakakosha kuti aonekwe semunhu akaparadzana. Izvi zvakanzwisiswa naVeronica ane makore 36, uyo akashamiswa kuti mwanakomana wake akakurumidza kuva nani. Pane imwe nguva, Gleb akaramba akatsamwa kana kusuruvara, akanga asina kugutsikana nezvose - asi mushure mechikamu chekutanga, mukomana wake akanaka, ane mutsa, ane mano akadzokera kwaari.

Apo avo vakakupoteredza vanoridza aramu

Vabereki, vakabatikana nekunetseka kwavo pachavo, havawanzoona kuti mwana ave asinganyanyi kufara, anoteerera, anoshanda. "Zvakakosha kuteerera kana mudzidzisi, mukoti wechikoro, mudzidzisi mukuru, chiremba vachiridza mhere ... Hapana chikonzero chekuronga njodzi, asi haufanirwe kurerutsa zviratidzo izvi," anoyambira Patrick Delaroche.

Aya ndiwo matangiro akaita Natalia pakurangana nomwanakomana wake ane makore mana okukura: “Mudzidzisi akati aigara achichema. Nyanzvi yepfungwa yakandibatsira kuziva kuti pashure pokurambana kwangu, takanga takabatana zvikuru. Zvakazoitikawo kuti haana kuchema "nguva dzose", asi chete mumavhiki iwayo paakaenda kuna baba vake.

Ivan achiri kutsamwira mudzidzisi akadana Zhanna hyperactive, "uye zvose nokuti musikana, unoona, anofanira kugara pakona, apo vakomana vanogona kumhanya-mhanya, uye zvakanaka!"

Galiya Nigmetzhanova anopa zano rekuti usavhunduka uye usamire mupose mushure mekunzwa kudzokororwa kwakashata nezvemwana, asi kutanga pane zvese, zvinyararire uye ushamwari kujekesa zvese. Kana, semuenzaniso, mwana akarwa kuchikoro, tsvaga kuti ndiani akarwa uye kuti aiva mwana werudzii, ndiani mumwe aivepo, hukama hupi mukirasi yose.

Izvi zvichakubatsira kunzwisisa kuti nei mwana wako akazvibata nenzira yaakaita. “Zvichida ane dambudziko muukama nemumwe munhu, kana kuti akabvuma kudheerera saizvozvo. Usati waita chiito, mufananidzo wacho wose unofanira kujekeswa.”

Kana tichiona shanduko huru

Kusava neshamwari kana kuita zvekudheerera, kana mwana wako ari kudheerera kana kudheerera vamwe, zvinoratidza matambudziko ehukama. Kana wechidiki asingazvikoshesi zvakakwana, asina kuzvivimba, anonyanya kuzvidya mwoyo, unofanira kuteerera kune izvi. Uyezve, mwana anoteerera zvakanyanya ane maitiro asina kunaka anogonawo kusashanda pachivande.

Zvinoitika kuti chero chinhu chingava chikonzero chekusangana nenyanzvi yepfungwa? “Hapana rudungwe ruchapedza, saka kutaura kwekunetseka kwepfungwa hakuenderane. Uyezve, dzimwe nguva vana vane mamwe matambudziko nekukurumidza kutsiviwa nevamwe, "akadaro Patrick Delaroche.

Saka unosarudza sei kana iwe uchida kuenda kune imwe nguva? Galiya Nigmetzhanova anopa mhinduro pfupi: "Vabereki mumafambiro emwana vanofanira kunyeverwa neicho "zuro" chakanga chisipo, asi chakaonekwa nhasi, ndiko kuti, chero kuchinja kukuru. Somuenzaniso, musikana agara achifara, uye kamwe kamwe manzwiro ake achinja zvikuru, ane misikanzwa, anokanda hasha.

Kana kuti zvakasiyana, mwana akanga asina kukakavara - uye kamwe kamwe anotanga kurwisana nemunhu wose. Hazvina mhosva kuti kuchinja uku kuri nani kana kuti kuri nani, chinhu chikuru ndechokuti hazvitarisirwi, hazvitarisirwi.” “Uye ngatisakanganwe enuresis, zviroto zvinogara zvichiitika…” anowedzera Patrick Delaroche.

Uye mwana akarega kuita zvakawanda anoda rubatsiro rwenyanzvi. Uye zvechokwadi, iwe unoda kusangana nemwana hafu kana iye pachake akakumbira kuona nyanzvi, izvo zvinowanzoitika mushure memakore 12-13.

"Kunyange kana vabereki vasina kunetseka nezve chero chinhu, kuuya nemwana kune chiremba wepfungwa kudzivirira kwakanaka," anopfupisa Galiya Nigmetzhanova. "Iri idanho rakakosha rekuvandudza hupenyu hwemwana newako."