Ndeupi musiyano uripo pakati pemaitiro echikadzi pakunakirwa neachirume? Zvinoita here kuita zvepabonde pasina kupindira? Maumbirwo emiviri yedu anokanganisa mafungiro edu kusvika papi? Sexologist Alain Eril uye psychoanalyst Sophie Kadalen vari kuyedza kutsvaga.
Nyanzvi yezvezvepabonde Alain Héril anotenda kuti vakadzi vari kutanga kuratidza kuhura kwavo zvishoma nezvishoma ... asi vanozviita zvinoenderana nemirairo yevarume. Psychoanalyst Sophie Cadalen anogadzirisa mhinduro zvakasiyana: eroticism inzvimbo iyo miganhu pakati pevarume nevakadzi inonyangarika ... Uye mukupokana, sezvamunoziva, chokwadi chinozvarwa.
Psychology: Pane erotica yechikadzi yakasiyana neyemurume here?
Sophie Cadalen: Ini handingatarise erotica chaiyo yevakadzi, izvo zvingave hunhu kune chero mukadzi. Asi panguva imwe chete, ndinoziva zvechokwadi: pane nguva dzinogona kuitika semukadzi chete. Uye izvozvo hazvina kufanana nokuva murume. Musiyano uyu ndiwo unotifarira pakutanga. Tinozvifunga, pasinei nekusarura kwakawanda, kuti tinzwisise: chii murume nemukadzi? chii chatinotarisira kubva kune mumwe nemumwe pabonde? chii chido chedu uye nzira yekunakidzwa? Asi tisati tapindura mibvunzo iyi, tinofanira kufunga nezvezvinhu zvitatu: nguva yatiri kurarama mairi, nguva yatakakura, uye nhoroondo yeukama hwevarume nevakadzi kusvikira nhasi.
Alain Eril: Ngatiedzei kutsanangura erotica. Todaidza chero manyuko ekutsvedza pabonde? Kana kuti chii chinotivhundutsa, chinokonzera kupisa mukati? Ese fungidziro nemafaro akabatana nezwi iri… Kwandiri, erotica ipfungwa yechishuwo, iyo inounzwa kuburikidza nemifananidzo. Saka, tisati tataura nezve erotica yevakadzi, munhu anofanira kubvunza kana paine chaiyo yevakadzi mifananidzo. Uye pano ndinobvumirana naSophie: hapana erotica yechikadzi kunze kwenhoroondo yevakadzi nenzvimbo yavo munharaunda. Chokwadi, pane chimwe chinhu chisingaperi. Asi nhasi hatinyatso ziva kuti ndezvipi zvimiro zvatinazvo zvechirume uye ndezvipi zvechikadzi, ndeupi musiyano wedu uye kufanana, zvishuwo zvedu - zvakare, zvechirume uye zvechikadzi. Zvese izvi zvinonakidza nekuti zvinotimanikidza kuzvibvunza mibvunzo.
Nekudaro, kana tikatarisa, semuenzaniso, panzvimbo dzezvinonyadzisira, isu zvinoita sekunge kune musiyano mukuru pakati pefungidziro dzechirume nedzechikadzi ...
SK: Naizvozvo, zvakakosha kurangarira nguva yatakabva. Ndinofunga kuti kubva pfungwa ye erotica yakasimuka, nzvimbo yemukadzi yakagara ichidzivirira. Tichiri kuhwanda kumashure - kazhinji tisingazive - pfungwa dzakadai nezvechikadzi dzinotirambidza kuwana mimwe mifananidzo. Ngatitorei zvinonyadzisira semuenzaniso. Kana tikafuratira zvakawanda zvekusarura uye maitiro ekudzivirira, zvichakurumidza kuva pachena kuti varume vakawanda havamudi, kunyange zvazvo vachiti zvinopesana, uye vakadzi, pane zvinopesana, vanomuda, asi vanonyatsovanza. Munguva yedu, vakadzi vari kusangana nekusawirirana kunotyisa pakati pehunhu hwavo hwechokwadi hwepabonde uye matauriro ayo. Pachine mukaha mukuru pakati perusununguko rwavanoti uye zvavanonzwa chaizvo uye vanogara vachizvirambidza ivo pachavo.
Izvi zvinoreva here kuti vakadzi vachiri vanyajambwa vepfungwa inobatwa nevarume nenzanga yose zvayo? Vachanyatsovanza fungidziro dzavo, zvishuvo uye kusambozvishandura kuva chokwadi?
SK: Ini ndinoramba izwi rekuti "akabatwa" nekuti ndinotenda kuti vakadzi ivo pachavo vanobatanidzwa mune izvi. Pandakatanga kudzidza zvinyorwa zveerotic, ndakawana chinhu chinonakidza: isu tinotenda kuti aya mabhuku echirume, uye panguva imwe chete isu tinotarisira - kubva kwatiri kana kubva kumunyori - chitarisiko chechikadzi. Eya, semuenzaniso, hutsinye hunhu hwemurume. Uye saka ndakaona kuti vakadzi vanonyora mabhuku akadai vanodawo kuona hutsinye huri munhengo yemurume. Mune izvi, vakadzi havana kusiyana nevarume.
AE: Chatinoti zvinonyadzisira ndeichi: chidzidzo chimwe chinonangidzira chishuwo chake kune chimwe chidzidzo, chichimuderedza kusvika pachinzvimbo chechinhu. Muchiitiko ichi, murume ndiye anonyanya kutaura, uye mukadzi ndiye chinhu. Ndosaka tichibatanidza zvinonyadzisira nehunhu hwechirume. Asi kana tikatora chokwadi mumamiriro ezvinhu enguva, tichaona kuti zvepabonde zvevakadzi hazvina kuonekwa kusvikira 1969, apo mapiritsi ekuberekwa akaonekwa, uye pamwe chete navo kunzwisisa kutsva kwehukama hwemuviri, zvepabonde uye kufara. Izvi zvakaitika munguva pfupi yapfuura. Ehe, kwagara kune vanhukadzi vane mukurumbira vakaita saLouise Labe.1, Colette2 kana Lou Andreas-Salome3avo vakamira nekuda kwepabonde, asi kuvakadzi vazhinji, zvose zvakanga zvichingotanga. Zvakaoma kwatiri kutsanangura erotica yechikadzi nekuti hatisati tanyatso kuziva kuti chii. Iye zvino tiri kuedza kuzvitsanangura, asi pakutanga tiri kufamba mumugwagwa wakatogadzirwa nemitemo yevarume eroticism: kuvakopa, kuvagadzirisa, kutanga kubva kwavari. Chinosiyana ndechekuti, pamwe, hukama hwengochani chete.
SK: Handibvumirane nemi pamusoro pemitemo yevarume. Hongu, iyi ndiyo nhoroondo yehukama pakati pechidzidzo nechinhu. Izvi ndizvo zvinorehwa nebonde, fungidziro dzepabonde: tese tiri pasi uye tinopesana. Asi izvi hazvirevi kuti zvinhu zvose zvinovakwa maererano nemitemo yevarume.
Hazvina maturo kutaura, isu takasiyana: muviri wechikadzi wakagadzirirwa kugamuchira, murume - kupinda mukati. Izvi zvine basa here mukuumbwa kwe erotica?
SK: Unogona kushandura zvese. Rangarira mufananidzo wemazino emukadzi: murume haana dziviriro, peni yake iri musimba remukadzi, anogona kumuruma. Nhengo yakamira inoita seinorwisa, asi ndikowo kusagona kukuru kwemurume. Uye kwete vakadzi vese vanorota nezvekuboorwa: mune erotica zvese zvakasanganiswa.
AE: Zvinoreva eroticism ndeyekutsiva mufungidziro yedu uye hunyanzvi chiitiko chepabonde sekudaro nenguva yekusangana pabonde. Iyi nzvimbo, iyo kubva kare yakanga iri yevarume, ikozvino inotungamirirwa nevakadzi: dzimwe nguva vanoita sevarume, dzimwe nguva vachipikisana nevarume. Tinofanira kupa rusununguko kukuda kwedu mutsauko kuti tigamuchire kuvhunduka uko chimwe chinhu chisiri chirume chose chose kana kuti chikadzi chose chose chinogona kutiunzira. Uku ndiko kutanga kwerusununguko rwechokwadi.
Zvinoreva erotica ndezvekutsiva mufungidziro yedu uye kusika chiito chepabonde sekudaro nenguva yekusangana pabonde.
SK: Ndinobvumirana newe pamusoro pekufungidzira uye kusika. Erotica hausi chete mutambo unotungamira kupinda. Kupinda hakusi magumo pachako. Erotica ndicho chese chatinotamba kusvika kumagumo, chine kana pasina kupinda.
AE: Pandakadzidza nezvebonde, takaudzwa nezve kutenderera kwepabonde: chishuwo, kufanoona, kupinda, orgasm… uye mudzanga (kuseka). Musiyano uripo pakati pemurume nemukadzi unonyanya kutaurwa mushure me orgasm: mukadzi anobva angogona kune inotevera. Apa ndipo pakavanzwa eroticism: mukuita uku pane chimwe chinhu chekuraira kuenderera. Izvi zvinonetsa isu varume: kupinda munzvimbo yepabonde umo kupinza uye kubuda urume hakureve kupera zvachose. Nenzira, ndinowanzonzwa mubvunzo uyu pakugamuchirwa kwangu: kusangana pabonde pasina kupinda kunganzi hukama hwepabonde chaihwo here?
SK: Vakadzi vakawanda vanobvunzawo mubvunzo uyu. Ini ndinobvumirana newe pane tsananguro ye erotica: inomuka kubva mukati, ichibva mukufungidzira, nepo zvinonyadzisira zvinoita zvemagetsi, zvichisiya pasina nzvimbo yekusaziva.
AE: Zvinonyadzisira ndizvo zvinotitungamirira kunyama, kune friction ye mucous membranes kune mumwe nemumwe. Isu hatigari mune hyper-erotic, asi mune hyper-ponographic nzanga. Vanhu vari kutsvaga nzira inobvumira kuita zvepabonde kushanda nemakanika. Izvi zvinobatsira kwete kune erotica, asi kune mafaro. Uye ichi hachisi chokwadi, nokuti ipapo tinozvisimbisa kuti tinofara munharaunda yepabonde. Asi iyi haisisiri hedonism, asi fivha, dzimwe nguva inorwadza, inowanzoshungurudza.
SK: Mufaro unorwisana nekubudirira. Tinofanira "kusvika ..." Tine pamberi pemeso edu, kune rumwe rutivi, mifananidzo yakawanda, pfungwa, zvinyorwa, uye kune imwe, yakanyanyisa conservatism. Zvinoratidzika kwandiri kuti erotica inotsvedza pakati pezviviri izvi zvakanyanyisa.
AE: Erotica inogara ichitsvaga nzira yekuzviratidza, nekuti hwaro hwayo ndiyo libido yedu. Apo vanyori vemifananidzo mukati meBvunzurudzo vakarambidzwa kupenda miviri isina kupfeka, vakaratidzira Kristu akarovererwa nenzira inosekesa zvikuru.
SK: Asi censorship inowanikwa kwese nekuti isu takatakura mukati medu. Erotica inogara ichiwanikwa painorambidzwa kana kunzi haina kunaka. Zvinoita sekuti zvese zvinotenderwa nhasi? Eroticism yedu inowana nzira yayo mune yega yega uye inobuda panguva yatisingafungire. Munzvimbo isiriyo, panguva isiriyo, nemunhu asiriye… Kusvotekana kunozvarwa nekutyorwa kwemaitiro edu asingazivi.
AE: Isu tinogara tichibata pane imwe nzvimbo ine hukama ne erotica kana tichitaura nezve ruzivo. Semuenzaniso, ndinotaura nezveseiri pakatarisana, uye munhu wese anonzwisisa kuti tiri kutaura nezvechikepe. Kugona uku kunobatsira maonero edu, kutanga nemashoko, kupedza chimwe chinhu chakakwana. Zvichida uyu ndiwo mutsauko unokosha pakati peerotica uye zvinonyadzisira: yekutanga chete mazano, yechipiri inopa pachena, nenzira yehasha. Hapana kuda kuziva mune zvinonyadzisira.
1 Louise Labé, 1522-1566, mudetembi wechiFrench, akatungamira hupenyu hwakavhurika, vanyori vakagashira, vaimbi uye maartist mumba make.
2 Colette (Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette), 1873–1954, aive munyori wechiFrench, anozivikanwawo nerusununguko rwake rwetsika uye nyaya zhinji dzerudo nevakadzi nevarume. Knight of the Order of the Legion of Honor.
3 Lou Andreas-Salome, Louise Gustavovna Salome (Lou Andreas-Salomé), 1861‒1937, mwanasikana waGeneral weRussia Service Gustav von Salome, munyori uye muzivi, shamwari uye anokurudzira waFriedrich Nietzsche, Sigmund Freud naRainer-Maria Rilke.