Amai vasina murume: matambudziko mashanu uye mhinduro yavo

Munyika, nhamba yevakadzi vari kurera vana vari voga iri kuramba ichiwedzera. Kune vamwe, izvi mhedzisiro yezvido zvavo uye sarudzo yekuziva, kune vamwe - kusangana kusiri kunaka kwemamiriro ezvinhu: kurambana, nhumbu isina kurongeka ... Asi kune vese vari vaviri, uyu hausi muyedzo uri nyore. Ngatinzwisise kuti sei zvakadaro.

Dambudziko nhamba 1. Kumanikidza kwevanhu

Hunhu hwemafungiro edu hunoratidza kuti mwana anofanira kunge aine zvese amai nababa. Kana baba vasipo nokuda kwechimwe chikonzero, veruzhinji vari kukurumidza kunzwira mwana tsitsi: "vana vanobva kumhuri dzine mubereki mumwe havagone kufara", "mukomana anoda baba, zvikasadaro haazokura kusvika kuva murume chaiye."

Kana danho rokurera mwana ari ega richibva kumukadzi pachake, vamwe vanotanga kugumbuka: “nokuda kwevana, munhu anogona kutsungirira,” “varume havadi vana vevamwe,” “mukadzi akarambwa vana havazogutsikani noupenyu hwake hwomunhu oga.”

Mudzimai anozviwana ari ega nedzvinyiriro yevamwe, izvo zvinoita kuti ape tuzvikonzero uye anzwe asina kururama. Izvi zvinomumanikidza kuzvivharira mukati uye kudzivirira kusangana nenyika dzekunze. Dzvinyiriro yacho inopinza mukadzi mukushushikana, chimiro chisina kunaka chekushushikana, uye inowedzera kuwedzera mamiriro ake epfungwa agara akashata.

Zvokuita?

Chokutanga pane zvose, bvisa zvinyengeri zvinotungamirira pakutsamira pamafungiro emumwe munhu. Semuyenzaniso:

• Vanhu vakandipoteredza vanogara vachindiongorora uye zviito zvangu, cherechedza kukanganisa.
• Rudo rwevamwe runofanira kuwanikwa, saka zvakakosha kufadza munhu wese.
• Maonero evamwe ndiwo akanyanya kunaka, sezvo achinyanya kuoneka kubva kunze.

Rusaruro rwakadai runoita kuti zviome kuenderana zvakakwana nemafungiro emumwe munhu - kunyangwe iyi iri imwe yemafungiro, uye kwete nguva dzose chinangwa chikuru. Wese munhu anoona chokwadi zvichibva pane yavo yekufungidzira yenyika. Uye zviri kwauri kuti usarudze kana pfungwa dzemumwe munhu dzichibatsira kwauri, kana uchizodzishandisa kuvandudza hupenyu hwako.

Vimba iwe, maonero ako uye zviito zvako zvakanyanya. Zvienzanise iwe nevamwe zvishoma. Zvikomberedze neavo vasingakumanikidzire, uye patsanura zvishuwo zvako kubva kune zvinotarisirwa nevamwe, zvikasadaro unoisa panjodzi yekudzosera hupenyu hwako nevana vako kumashure.

Dambudziko nhamba 2. Kusurukirwa

Kusurukirwa nderimwe rematambudziko makuru anokanganisa hupenyu hwaamai vasina murume, mune chiitiko chekurambana kwekumanikidzwa uye mune yechisarudzo chekuziva kurera vana pasina murume. Nechisikigo, zvakakosha zvakanyanya kuti mukadzi akomberedzwe nevanhu vepedyo, vanodikanwa. Anoda kugadzira imba yekutandarira, kuunganidza vanhu vaaida kwaari vakamukomberedza. Kana kutarisa uku kukadonha nekuda kwechimwe chikonzero, mukadzi anorasikirwa netsoka yake.

Amai vari voga vanoshaya tsigiro yetsika neyomuviri, pfungwa yepfudzi romurume. Bhanari, asi tsika dzinodiwa dzekukurukurirana kwezuva nezuva nemumwe wako zvinova zvisingasviki kwaari: mukana wekugoverana nhau dzezuva rapfuura, kurukura nezvebhizimisi kubasa, kubvunzurudza matambudziko evana, kutaura pamusoro pemafungiro ako nemanzwiro. Izvi zvinokuvadza zvikuru mukadzi uye zvinomupinza mumamiriro ekuora mwoyo.

Mamiriro ezvinhu anomuyeuchidza nezve "kusurukirwa" kwake anowedzera uye anowedzera chiitiko. Somuenzaniso, manheru, vana pavanenge vakarara uye mabasa epamba aitwazve, ndangariro dzinopinda nesimba idzva uye kusurukirwa kunonyanya kunzwika. Kana kuti pakupera kwevhiki, paunoda kuenda nevana pa“nzendo dzoga” kuzvitoro kana kumabhaisikopo.

Mukuwedzera, shamwari uye vanozivana kubva kune yekare, "mhuri" yemagariro evanhu pakarepo vanomira kudana uye kukoka vaenzi. Izvi zvinoitika nokuda kwezvikonzero zvakasiyana-siyana, asi kazhinji mamiriro ezvinhu ekare haazivi kuti angaita sei pakuparadzana kwevakaroorana, saka, kazhinji inomisa kutaurirana kupi zvako.

Zvokuita?

Danho rokutanga hakusi kutiza dambudziko. “Izvi hazvisi kuitika kwandiri” kuramba kuchaita kuti zvinhu zvitonyanya kuipa. Gamuchira kusurukirwa kwokumanikidzirwa wakadzikama semamiriro ezvinhu echinguvana auri kuda kushandisa kuti zvikunakire.

Danho rechipiri nderekutsvaga zvakanaka pakuve wega. Kuva wega kwenguva pfupi, mukana wekugadzira, rusununguko rwekusaenderana nezvido zvemumwe wako. Chii chimwe? Ita runyoro rwezvinhu gumi. Zvakakosha kudzidza kuona mumamiriro ako kwete kwete chete, asiwo mativi akanaka.

Danho rechitatu chiito chinoshanda. Kutya kunomisa kuita, kuita kunomisa kutya. Rangarira mutemo uyu uye shanda. Vazivikanwi vatsva, zviitwa zvevaraidzo zvitsva, chitandadzo chitsva, chipfuyo chitsva - chero chiitiko chichaita icho chichakubatsira kuti usasurukirwa uye kuzadza nzvimbo yakakupoteredza nevanhu vanofarira uye zviitiko.

Dambudziko nhamba 3. Mhosva pamberi pemwana

“Kunyima mwana wababa”, “hakuna kuponesa mhuri”, “kutongera mwana upenyu hwakaderera” — ichi chinongova chikamu chiduku cheizvo mukadzi anozvipa mhosva nokuda kwacho.

Uyezve, zuva rega rega anotarisana nemamiriro ezvinhu akasiyana-siyana ezuva nezuva anoita kuti awedzere kunzwa ane mhosva: aisakwanisa kutengera mwana wake toyi nokuti haana kuwana mari yakakwana, kana kuti haana kuitora kubva kukireshi nenguva, nekuti aitya kunonoka kubasa .

Mhosva inoungana, mukadzi anowedzera kutya uye kuvhunduka. Iye anonyanya kukosha, anonetseka pamusoro pemwana, anogara achimutarisira, anoedza kumudzivirira kubva pamatambudziko ose uye anoedza kuzadzisa zvose zvaanoda.

Somugumisiro, izvi zvinotungamirira kune chokwadi chokuti mwana anokura zvakanyanya kunyumwira, anovimba uye akatarisa kwaari. Mukuwedzera, anokurumidza kuziva "marwadzo" aamai uye anotanga kuashandisa asingazivi pakugadzirisa kwevana vake.

Zvokuita?

Zvakakosha kuziva simba rinoparadza remhosva. Mukadzi kazhinji haanzwisisi kuti dambudziko harisi mukushayikwa kwababa uye kwete mune zvaakanyima mwana, asi mumamiriro ake epfungwa: mukunzwa mhosva uye kuzvidemba kwaanoita mumamiriro ezvinhu aya.

Munhu akadzvinyirirwa nemhosva angafara sei? Chokwadi kwete. Mai vasina mufaro vangava nevana vanofara here? Chokwadi kwete. Achiedza kuyananisa mhosva, mukadzi wacho anotanga kupa upenyu hwake nokuda kwomwana. Uye zvino, avo vakabatwa vanounzwa kwaari se invoice yekubhadhara.

Ratidza mhosva yako. Zvibvunze mibvunzo: "Mhosva yangu ndeipi mumamiriro ezvinhu aya?", "Ndinogona kugadzirisa mamiriro acho here?", "Ndingagadzirisa sei?". Nyora uye uverenge mhinduro dzako. Funga nezvekuti pfungwa yako yekuva nemhosva inoruramiswa sei, ndeyechokwadi sei uye yakaenzana nemamiriro ezvinhu aripo?

Zvichida pasi pekunzwa uine mhosva iwe unovanza kutsamwa kusingatauriki uye utsinye? Kana kuti uri kuzviranga nokuda kwezvakaitika? Kana kuti unoda waini kune chimwe chinhu here? Nekugadzirisa mhosva yako, iwe unozokwanisa kuziva uye kubvisa zvikonzero zvekuitika kwayo.

Dambudziko # 4

Rimwe dambudziko rinotarisana naamai vasina varume nderekuti hunhu hwemwana hunoumbwa chete pahwaro hwerudzi rwechikadzi rwekurerwa. Izvi ndezvechokwadi kunyanya kana baba vasingabatanidzwi muupenyu hwomwana zvachose.

Zvamazvirokwazvo, kuti akure sohunhu hunotsinhirana, kunoshuviwa kuti mwana adzidze ose ari maviri marudzi etsika dzechikadzi neechirume. Kurerekera kwakajeka munzira imwe chete kwakazara nematambudziko nekuwedzera kuzvizivisa.

Zvokuita?

Batanidza hama dzechirume, shamwari, uye vaunozivana navo mukurera vana. Kuenda kumabhaisikopo nasekuru, kuita basa rechikoro nababamunini, kuenda kumusasa neshamwari mikana mikuru yokuti mwana adzidze marudzi akasiyana ehunhu hwechirume. Kana zvichikwanisika kubatanidza baba vemwana kana hama dzake mukuita kurera mwana, usaregeredza izvi, kunyangwe mhosva yako yakakura sei.

Dambudziko nhamba 5. Hupenyu hwepamwe nekukasira

Chimiro chaamai vasina murume chinogona kutsamwisa mukadzi kuita chimbichimbi nezviito zvechimbichimbi. Mukuedza kukurumidza kubvisa "kunyadziswa" uye kutambudzwa nemhosva pamberi pemwana, mukadzi anowanzopinda muukama hwaasingadi kana kuti hwaasati agadzirira.

Zvinongokosha kwaari kuti mumwe munhu aive pedyo naye, uye kuti mwana aive nababa. Panguva imwecheteyo, hunhu hwemunhu wemudiwa mutsva kazhinji hunopera kumashure.

Pane kumwe kunyanyisa, mukadzi anozvipa amene chose chose mukurera mwana ndokugumisa upenyu hwake hwomunhu oga. Kutya kuti murume mutsva haagamuchiri mwana wake, haazomudi sewake, kana kuti mwana achafunga kuti amai vamuchinjanisa na "sekuru vatsva", zvinogona kuita kuti mukadzi arege kuedza kuvaka imba yake. hupenyu zvachose.

Zvose mumamiriro ekutanga uye echipiri, mwana achatambura. Muchiitiko chekutanga, nokuti achaona kutambura kwaamai pedyo nemunhu asina kururama. Muchipiri - nokuti achaona kutambura kwaamai vake mukusurukirwa uye anozvipa mhosva nokuda kwayo.

Zvokuita?

Tora nguva yekubuda. Usamhanyira kukurumidza kutsvaga mwana baba vatsva kana kuedza korona yekusaroora. Zvichenjerere iwe pachako. Ongorora kana wagadzirira hukama hutsva? Funga nezvekuti nei uchida hukama hutsva, chii chinokufambisa: mhosva, kusurukirwa kana chido chekufara?

Kana, pane zvinopesana, iwe ukarega kuedza kuronga hupenyu hwemunhu, fungisisa pamusoro pezvinokusundira kune iyi sarudzo. Kutya kumutsa godo romwana kana kuti kutya kuodzwa mwoyo kwako umene? Kana kuti chinoitika chakaipa chakapfuura chinokuita kuti udzivise kudzokorora mugariro wacho nenzira iri yose here? Kana kuti isarudzo yako yokuziva uye yakadzikama here?

Iva akatendeseka iwe pachako uye paunenge uchiita sarudzo, tungamirirwa nemutemo mukuru: "Amai vanofara mwana anofara."